silent crys for deliverence
by miSSmeliSS1324124
Summary: sequel to silent crys for salvation. Kendall and Logan are in love but what will happen when everthing starts to fall apart. can they stay together or will the coming tide rip them apart
1. preface

**A/N: Is that cheering I hear… now why would I hear that? Idk maybe because this is the first chapter for the sequel to Silent Crys for Salvation! =] well I hope you guys enjoy the very short first chapter. The rest won't be like this I promise…**

"You're lying!" Logan bald up his fist and clenched his jaw. Kendall continued to stare at Logan with apathy.

"I'm not." The longer Logan looked at Kendall the angrier he got. This couldn't be happening it wasn't possible. Logan stepped forward closing the distance between himself and Kendall.

"Yes you are!" Logan could feel tears of anger running down his face. "You said… you said you loved me! You said I was b-beautiful! I know you meant it! Stop lying to me! You meant it!"

"No I didn't… I felt sorry for you so I humored you." Kendall narrowed his eyes at Logan as he took another step forward.

"b-but all those times we… you felt something I know you did! You mad loved to me it was special…"

"No it wasn't I just wanted to get something out of this." Logan widened his eyes in horror. He stepped forward again so he was inches from Kendall. Kendall didn't move and just stared down at him. Logan grabbed onto Kendall's shirt roughly and started shaking him.

"STOP LYING! Please just stop! You don't mean that you can't mean that! I love you Kendall!" Kendall ripped Logan's hand off his shirt and pushed him. Logan stumbled a little but regained his balance. He stared at Kendall shocked for a moment then became angry again. Logan moved back over to Kendall and started banging on his chest with his fists. Kendall pushed Logan again but he didn't stop.

"Stop it Logan."

"Not until you tell me the truth!" Kendall pushed Logan again but he continued to ignore him.

"Stop!"

"I said no!"

"God Dam it stop!" Kendall pushed Logan and punched him in the jaw. Logan fell onto his back and sat up slowly, shocked. He brought his hand up to his face and touched the area. Logan pulled his hand back and noticed some blood on his fingers. Logan stared up at Kendall with wide eyes; there was no remorse in his expression. All the anger Logan had felt washed away. Out of all the people in the world Kendall was the last person Logan expected to hit him. Logan's brow furrowed and his lip quivered. His body began to shake as an endless stream of tears fell down his face. Logan let out a loud sob but Kendall didn't move to comfort him. He stayed in his spot watching Logan fall to pieces. Logan rolled over onto his hands and knees and slowly stood up. He glanced at Kendall before he ran back towards the Palm Woods. Kendall let out a sigh as he watched Logan run away from him. If it were any other time Kendall would be the one to comfort him. But not this time, this time Kendall was the one who destroyed him.

**A/N: I know this was short but I just wanted to introduce the sequel. Lol anyway! Oh no! What could all this mean! You'll have to wait until the next chapter to see.**

**There is more to come. **


	2. pure love

Logan moaned and wrapped his legs tighter around Kendall. His slow sensual movements were making Logan's head spin. It was the morning of their one year anniversary and they were starting it off with a bang. This was different though, special. They weren't having sex they were making love. It was obvious because of Kendall's slow movements, soft touches and constant whispers of "I love you." It was obvious in the way that Logan didn't scream from ecstasy but moaned softly. He clung to Kendall rather than clawed him and whispered "I love you" as well. They kept their eyes on each other staring into each other seeing nothing but love. They were together at this moment because they loved each other not because they lusted each other.

"You're so beautiful." Kendall pressed his lips to Logan's softly while he ran his fingers gingerly up and down Logan's arms. Logan moaned into the kiss as Kendall sped up his thrusts. Kendall pulled away from the kiss and laced his fingers with Logan's above Logan's head. Logan shut his eyes and turned his head to the side as Kendall started mouthing at his jaw.

"I'm gunna cum." Logan whispered out. Logan whimpered when Kendall sped up his thrusts more. He could tell Kendall was about to lose it too because of his constant grunts and by the way his hands squeezed Logan's every time he thrust forward. Kendall kissed Logan's cheek to get his attention. Logan turned his head and opened his eyes staring up at Kendall. Kendall leaned forward and attached their lips; Logan whining and tensing seconds later. Logan squeezed Kendall's hands and jerked his hips as he was consumed by his orgasm. After three more thrusts Kendall pulled away from Logan's lips and let out a long groan as he came. His hips stuttered and his eyes rolled as he released his seed within Logan. When they both came down from their orgasm Kendall collapsed fully against Logan. He rested his head on the pillow as he kissed Logan's cheek. Logan Kept his legs wrapped around Kendall's waist and he wrapped his arms around Kendall's torso. He wanted to make sure Kendall stayed right where he was for as long as possible. Logan kissed his shoulder softly moving towards his neck. When he turned his head completely he was face to face with Kendall. "I love you." Kendall smiled and kissed Logan's nose.

"I love you more than anything." Logan smiled warmly at Kendall and rubbed their noses together. They kissed one more time before Kendall lifted himself up and slowly pulled himself out of Logan. Logan whimpered slightly making Kendall leaned down and kiss him again. He climbed out of bed and stood up stretching. "Do you want to take a shower first?" Logan shook his head.

"No you go ahead." Kendall nodded and walked into the bathroom. Once the door was closed Logan lay back in bed and let out a blissful sigh. Logan and Kendall had been together for a full year. What made it even better was that they loved each other more and more every day. Logan couldn't see himself without Kendall and he knew he was always going to have Kendall. They would spend their lives together. Logan rolled onto his stomach and covered himself with the blanket. He hugged Kendall's pillow and breathed in deeply, loving the scent. Logan had planned to go back to sleep until Kendall got out of the shower but when the door bust open he nearly jumped out of his skin. Logan scrambled to make sure the covers were completely covering him before he looked up to see who had walked in. Logan narrowed his eye when he spotted a grinning Carlos and James.

"Have you two ever heard of knocking?" Carlos jumped into a sitting position on Logan's bed.

"Nope. It's not like you were doing anything." James scoffed.

"Carlos you are so innocent sometimes. They were obviously doing something." James grimaced and looked around. "It smells like sex in here." Logan rolled his eyes. It was still embarrassing but he was starting to get used to James and Carlos openly talking about sex. Carlos did bring Stephanie over all the time and a month ago James started bring Rachael over. So as it stood now, none of them were virgins and they were all having loads of sex. Kendall and Logan did it the most while James did it the least. He and Rachael have been dating for the shortest amount of time so they weren't at the stage Kendall and Logan were at yet. Carlos also grimaced when he took in the smell of the room.

"Not to mention he's naked on Kendall's bed." Logan unconsciously pulled the blanket over himself more. Out of the four he was probably the least comfortable with his body. He didn't think he was ugly or anything but he wasn't very comfortable with being naked around other people. In fact Kendall was the only person who ever saw Logan naked. Once Logan was old enough to dress himself his parents never even saw him naked.

"Now that we have that out of the way, what do you want?" Logan was starting to get annoyed with his two friends. They always picked the worst times to come into his room. He probably should start mentally preparing himself for the day they walk in on Kendall and him having sex now.

"Someone's on the phone for you." Logan furrowed his eyebrows at James. Who would be calling him? The thought actually made Logan a little sad. With no family he never did get any phone calls. James and Carlos talked to their parents almost every day and Kendall talked to his dad at least once a week.

"Ok, give me a minute." James and Carlos nodded and left the room. Once the door was closed Logan climbed out of bed and threw on some sweatpants. He was doing amazingly since it's been so long since everything happened. But that didn't mean that little things didn't make him think about it again. Like the phone call, things like that were just depressing. Logan walked into the kitchen and picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Hello, Logan this is Edward Chester. R-Ryan's father." Logan could sense the apprehension in Mr. Chester's voice. The last time Logan talked to him was when he came to apologize.

"Yes, how can I help you?" There was a pause before Mr. Chester began.

"Well we had an… incident and I was wondering if maybe you might have heard something." Logan furrowed his eyebrows.

"Incident?"

"Yes, during Ryan's wake last week his body… was stolen." Logan's eyes widened.

"Stolen?"

"Yes… we were wondering if you've heard anything… if anyone has said anything to you… maybe bragged about it." Mr. Chester paused. "I hope I'm not offending you in any way."

"No, of course not Mr. Chester. If I were in your position I would be calling me too. And no I haven't heard anything. If I do I'll be sure to call you." Mr. Chester sighed.

"Thank you." Logan said goodbye and hung up the phone. When he turned around Kendall was watching him concerned.

"How long have you been there?" Kendall ruffled his wet hair with the towel in his hand.

"Not long. I only heard the end of that. Who was that?" Logan sighed.

"Mr. Chester." Kendall's eyes narrowed.

"What does he want?" Logan sighed.

"Kendall… you shouldn't be so rude to them. And anyway, they called because someone stole Ryan's body at his wake last week and they wanted to know if we had heard anything."

"What, he thought we had something to do with it!"

"No Kendall. He just called because he figured if anyone may have knew anything it would be us. I mean why would someone steal his body unless they were trying to punish him for something he did." Kendall sighed seeming to understand what Logan was trying to say.

"Why did they have his wake last week?" Logan furrowed his eyebrows.

"What do you mean?"

"Well he died months ago. Why did they wait?"

"They probably wanted to wait until the situation died down but I guess they didn't wait long enough. What doesn't make sense though is how can someone just take a body and leave?" Kendall shrugged.

"Why don't you go take a shower. Let's not worry about this anymore. Logan nodded and kissed Kendall's cheek before walking passed him back to their room. He smiled to himself before turning around planning to go change.

"Kendall." Kendall turned around when he heard his mother's voice call him. "I'm going out with Katie today so you and the others be careful." Kendall nodded. Mrs. Knight smiled and walked over to her son to kiss his cheek. "Ok, I'll see you later and I hope you and Logan have a happy one year anniversary." Kendall smiled and waved goodbye to his mom and sister as they left. He went back to his and Logan's room and walked over to his dresser. He pulled out a pair of black jeans and a dark blue/black t shirt. He pulled them on then grabbed a pair of vans and put them on. Kendall decided to put on a dark guy necklace and a black bracelet as well. The necklace was a dark thin rope material that had a small metal circle hanging down from the front of it. The bracelet was a rubber material and was made to look like her was wearing multiple bracelets. As a last piece Kendall threw on a belt and looked himself in the mirror. He smiled completely satisfied with his look. Kendall walked over to the bathroom door to make sure Logan wasn't out yet. He walked over to his night stand and opened the top draw and dug through it. After moving some stuff around he pulled out a velvet box. When he opened it there was a single gold ring. It was simple with the phrase "always and forever" engraved on the inside. Kendall smiled and put the ring in his pocket. A few seconds later Logan walked out of the bathroom. Kendall swallowed hard. Logan was completely naked… no towel… nothing. Kendall almost couldn't resist the urge to throw him against the wall and fuck him from behind.

"Your such a tease you know that" Logan chuckled and smiled.

"I forgot my towel." Kendall rolled his eyes.

"Yea… sure you did." Logan grabbed the towel from his bed and wrapped it around his waist. He grabbed another towel and started to dry himself off. Logan glanced back and smiled when he noticed Kendall was licking his lips while watching him. Logan turned back around and smirked. He could have some fun with this. He strut over to his dresser and bent down slowly to open the bottom draw. He pulled out a pair of boxers then slowly stood back up making sure to stick his butt out. He pulled the boxers on while still wearing his towel, then dropped it once his boxers were on. He bent down sticking his butt out a little while he slowly rummaged through his draw. When he heard a growl from behind him he pulled out a pair of dark blue jeans. He pulled them on and stretched his arms above his head while letting out a cute little moaning sound. Logan was about to open his top draw but a force from behind him pushed him into his dresser. Kendall laid his chin on Logan's shoulder making him shiver from Kendall's warm breath on his neck. "Could you not turn me on so bad I want to fuck you. Kendall moved his crotch against Logan's ass for emphasis. Logan moaned and pushed back against Kendall.

"I'll try my best." Kendall nipped Logan's ear before pulling away and leaving the room.

"I'll be in the living room when you're ready!" Logan huffed and finished getting dressed. He threw on a grey/blue button down shirt then put a black v-neck sweat vest over that. He threw on a pair of converses and looked himself in the mirror. He put his fingers through his hair to make sure it was styled correctly then smiled. Logan walked into the living room where Kendall was talking to Carlos and Stephanie.

"When did you get here Stephanie?" She smiled at Logan and hugged him.

"About a minute ago, we're going on a double date with James and Rachael." Stephanie walked back over to Carlos and let him wrap his arm around her waist. Kendall turned to Logan and grabbed his hand.

"Well we better get going. See you later!" Before Logan had a chance to say goodbye to Carlos and Stephanie Kendall had pulled him out the door. Stephanie sighed and leaned into Carlos.

"Something wrong?" Stephanie shook her head.

"No I was just thinking about how good they are together. They're so happy." Carlos smiled and nodded.

"Yea, they are happy." He looked down at Stephanie smiling. "I'm happy too." Stephanie smiled and pulled Carlos into a soft kiss. "We better get going James and Rachael are already downstairs waiting for us." Stephanie nodded and walked out the door hand and hand with Carlos.

When Kendall and Logan reached the lobby James and Rachael were standing by the door. "James." James turned and waved at his two friends.

"Hey did you guys see Stephanie and Carlos?"

"Yea, they should be on their way down." James nodded and smiled at Logan.

"Ok, well you two have a good one year." Kendall and Logan smiled and left the Palm Woods.

* * *

The first destination on Logan and Kendall's date was the LA carnival. It was in town for a week and the two boys decided it would be fun to stop by for a few hours. As soon as they bought their tickets Kendall pulled Logan towards the booths.

"Pick a booth Logie cause I'm going to win you something." Logan chuckled. He loved the idea of Kendall trying so hard to get him something. The first booth they went to was the usual throw the ball and knock over the pins. Kendall bought three balls and picked up his first one. He aimed and then threw the ball grazing the top pin. "So close!" Kendall picked up the second ball but this time missed completely. Kendall huffed and pouted going for the last ball.

"Kendall?" Kendall turned to Logan questioningly. "Can I try?" Kendall stared at Logan for a moment then gestured for him to go ahead. Logan picked up the last ball and aimed. He threw it and it hit the three pins dead on knocking them all over.

"We have a winner!" Kendall's jaw dropped. Logan pointed to a stuffed puppy and he held it out for Kendall. Kendall took it still staring at Logan.

"How did… you… I… you… not fair." Logan chuckled.

"It's all physics. And besides now you have a stuffed puppy like the one you gave me." Kendall smiled and wrapped his arm around Logan.

"Fine but I still want to win you something." After three fails Kendall finally won Logan a small kitten stuffed animal. Kendall was actually happy he had lost at the other booths. Logan had a weakness for kittens and the way he held the stuffed animal to his chest was just adorable.

"Do you want to go on any of the rides?" Kendall nodded and they both walked towards the rides. The first one they went on was the round-up. It was the least scary but it could defiantly make you sick. The way it spun around and forced you back against the sides was exhilarating. And it was always funny to watch people stick their arms out only to have it fall back down and hit them in the face. When they got off the ride they couldn't help but feel a little wobbly. "That was fun." Logan giggled. Kendall grasped Logan's waist to make sure he didn't fall over. Once they composed themselves they moved on to the rest of the rides. After two hours the boys had gone to every booth and almost every ride. The only two rides left were the Ferris wheel and the haunted Castle.

"Which do you want to do first?" Logan looked towards the castle ride and grimaced.

"You really want to do the haunted castle?" Kendall chuckled and nodded.

"Don't worry Logie, I'll protect you." Logan rolled his eyes and pulled Kendall to the ride. He was over reacting it wasn't going to be that scary.

"AAAAHHHH!" Logan jumped into Kendall's lap when a zombie jumped out in front of them. Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan's waist chuckling softly. Logan was happy the darkness of the room was able to hide his blush. Him screaming like a girl was a little embarrassing. When they cleared the dark room Logan relaxed a little. The ride was almost over. He felt like a wimp because he got so scared over that stupid ride. Logan looked down at his lap and noticed something black. He rolled his eyes. It was a fake spider. He was tired of getting scared. Logan went to reach down and pick it up but then… it moved. Logan's eyes widened and he froze. "K-K-Kendall… K-Kendall! Kendall!" Kendall's brow furrowed when he noticed Logan was starting to hyperventilate.

"Logan? What's wrong?" Logan pointed down at his lap and as tears started to spring up in his eyes.

"Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!" Kendall glanced down and grimaced when he noticed the giant spider and Logan's lap. Logan was shaking as the spider started crawling up him. When it reached the hem of his shirt it tried to burry it's self under it. "AH! KENDALL!" Kendall grabbed the bug by its legs and flung it out of the cart. Logan ran his hands over himself making sure there was nothing there. Logan shivered and curled into Kendall's side. "Thank you." Kendall smiled and kissed the side of Logan's head.

"No problem." When the ride came to a stop Kendall and Logan made their way to the Ferris wheel. When they sat in their seats Logan scooted over until he was snuggled into Kendall's side. Kendall wrapped his arm around Logan's waist and kissed the top of his head.

"Amazing." Kendall turned his head to look in the direction Logan was looking. From the top of the Ferris wheel they could see the beach. The waves lapped against the shore and the sun was starting to set. The sky was beautiful shades of orange, pink and red. Kendall smiled and lifted Logan's chin so their eyes were locked.

"Not as amazing as you." Logan blushed and leaned in to kiss Kendall. The kiss was slow and passionate causing amazing sparks to go through both of them. While their lips moved together Kendall reached into his pocket and took out the velvet box. Logan was smiling when he pulled away. Kendall's smile grew and Logan heard a sudden pop. He glanced down and gasped. Kendall held is hand out in front of Logan. The velvet box was open revealing the golden ring, which sparkled from the lights of the carnival. Logan slowly took the ring from the box and held it up with his thumb and pointer finger. "Read the inscription." Logan tilted his head while looking at the inside of the ring.

"Always and forever." Logan smiled and kissed Kendall on the lips. Kendall took the ring and slid it on Logan's finger. Logan put his hand in a soft fist and looked at the ring. "Kendall I…" A tear rolled down Logan's face. He wiped it away and turned to Kendall smiling brightly. "I love it." Kendall wiped away another tear that was falling down Logan's face.

"I love you so much Logan. I will never want any one other then you. You're my world." Kendall reached his hand up and cupped Logan's cheek. Logan placed his hand over Kendall's hand as Kendall cleared his throat.

_When I see your face  
There's not a thing that I would change  
Cause you're amazing  
Just the way you are  
And when you smile,  
The whole world stops and stares for awhile  
Cause __**boy**__ you're amazing  
Just the way you are_

_(the way you are by Bruno Mars)_

Logan giggled noticing the lyric change. He blushed and more tears fell. He was just so touched. Nothing was better than this moment. When the ride stopped Kendall and Logan walked off hand in hand. They left the carnival and got back in the car to get to their next destination.

* * *

When they pulled up to the restaurant they both realized how hungry they were. They walked inside and walked up to the host who was smiling at them.

"Hi, I have a reservation under Knight." The woman glanced down then smiled again.

"Yes, right this way sir." Kendall held Logan's hand as the woman led them to their table. She placed to menus on the table and smiled at both of them before leaving. They stayed silent as they looked through the menu. Kendall took another minute longer then Logan and when he finally put his menu down he noticed Logan was looking at his ring and smiling.

"Logan." Logan glanced up blushing when he realized he had been caught.

"Sorry I just can't stop looking at it." Kendall smiled and held Logan's hand. Throughout their dinner they talked not letting a single moment being filled by silence. When Kendall and Logan were with each other it was like no one else existed. They almost didn't notice whenever the waiter came over. When they finished their meal they left the restaurant to go home. Kendall laid his head against Logan's shoulder as they drove. Logan had finally gotten his full license so they no longer needed an adult in the car. "Today was wonderful Kendall." Kendall sat up and smiled at Logan.

"Every minute I'm with you is wonderful." Kendall smirked when he noticed the light blush coming to Logan's cheeks. When they pulled into the Palm Woods Kendall quickly walked around the car so he could hold Logan as soon as he was out of the car. He wrapped his arm around his waist as they walked through the lobby. It was late so their wasn't that many people around. When they returned to the apartment it looked like no one was around until they heard noise from Carlos and James' room and noise from the bathroom. The shower was on and Kendall smirked when he realized there were moans coming from the bathroom. Logan smirked when he heard moans and grunts coming from Carlos and James' room. They could tell from the sounds that Carlos was in his room with Stephanie while James was in the bathroom with Rachael. "We wouldn't want to break the chain." Kendall smirked at Logan and pulled him into a kiss. He forcefully parted Logan's lips and moved his tongue around Logan's mouth exploring. Kendall ran his hands down Logan's back moving over the curve of his ass. He rubbed Logan's butt making him mewl and move his hips against Kendall's hands. Kendall pulled back one hand and smacked Logan's ass harshly. Logan yelped then moaned when Kendall squeezed the area he just hit. Kendall squeezed both of Logan's cheeks and lifted him up. Logan got the message and wrapped his legs around Kendall's waist. Kendall walked Logan to their room as Logan moved from kissing his lips to mouthing at his jaw and cheek. As they passed Carlos and James' room the door opened revealing a boxer clad Carlos. He smirked and raised an eyebrow as the two walked by. "Sup Carlos." Carlos chuckled and turned back to his room as Kendall closed the door to his.

"I need you Kendall." Kendall laid Logan on the bed and rested himself between his legs. He kissed Logan gently before pulling back to remove all their cloths. Kendall moved back to his previous position and ground his hips into Logan. Logan threw his head back and let out a long moan as their erections rubbed together. "Mmm Kendall." Kendall smirked and thrust his hips slow and hard.

"I love you." Kendall attached his lips to Logan's neck and continued to thrust into him.

"I love… ah... you too." Kendall detached himself from Logan and got up from the bed. Logan watched him breathing heavily as he moved to the nightstand and took out the lube. Kendall walked back over to Logan with a smirk on his face and climbed back on top of him. He poured some lube on his finger and probed Logan's entrance. Logan bit his lip and whimpered as Kendall slid his finger in. His brow was furrowed in concentration as he moved his hips against Kendall's hand. When Logan's entrance loosened around Kendall's finger he added another making Logan moan. "Ah… ah… Kendall I need you…. Ahhhh" Logan let out a long moan when Kendall rubbed his fingers against Logan's prostate. Kendall pulled his fingers out and replaced them with his well lubricated erection. Logan let out a long moan as Kendall slowly pushed into him. Kendall groaned at the tightness wanting nothing more than to pound into Logan.

"Are you ready?" Logan nodded.

"Don't go easy on me." Logan smiled seductively at Kendall. He growled before leaning on his elbows for support and thrusting in hard. Kendall started with a rough pace doing exactly as Logan asked. Logan wrapped his legs around Kendall's waist and moaned with every thrust. "Ah ah harder." Kendall groaned while he increased the force of his thrusts. Logan whined and threaded his fingers through his own hair.

"Oh god you're so hot… so beautiful." Kendall grunted as his thrusts sped up.

"I'm ah gunna cum!" Kendall gave one powerful thrust making Logan cry out from his orgasm. Logan's eyes rolled back and his hips stuttered trying to force more of Kendall inside of him. When Logan's orgasm ended he muscles relaxed and he tried to regain his breath. Kendall pulled out still rock hard. He moved to Logan's nipple and began to suck on it making Logan moan. Kendall ran his fingers over Logan's dick making him jerk from the sensitive area being touched. Kendall moved down to Logan's bully button and sucked on the skin under it making Logan giggle. Kendall kissed around Logan's dick making him bit his lip with anticipation. He moved past it and and began to suck on his balls. Logan gripped onto the bed sheets and let out a moan. The force of Kendall's sucking making him hard again. Kendall moved down farther making Logan gasp. Logan sat up on his elbows and looked down at Kendall. "What are you doing?" Kendall smirked.

"You'll see." Logan was about to say something else but stopped when he felt Kendall's tongue at his entrance. Logan fell back against the bed his mouth opening in a silent scream. Kendall had never done this and the new sensation was amazing. Kendall placed his hands on the back of Logan's thighs so he could better hold his legs apart. Logan was thrashing and moaning as Kendall's tongue moved inside of him. After flicking his tongue inside of Logan one last time he moved back up him and flipped them. Logan looked confused for a moment so Kendall placed his erection at Logan's entrance making him gasp. "Ride me baby." Logan blushed and pushed Kendall into him. He let out a moan as he slid down until Kendall was fully inside. Logan placed his hands on Kendall's chest for support as he started to bounce up and down. His eyes were closed as he continued to moan from the sensation. Kendall gripped Logan's hips and thrust up into him. Logan moaned and sped up his thrusts beginning to feel on edge again. "I'm gunna cum baby." Kendall whispered out as he rammed up into Logan.

"I'm almost there." Logan sat forward more allowing Kendall more room to thrust up. The first thrust from that angle made Logan scream as his prostate was hit perfectly. Kendall thrust up hard three more times before he released his seed within Logan. Logan's back arched as he felt Kendall filling him. He moaned as his own cum was forced out of him. Logan lifted off of Kendall and collapsed next to him. They stayed silent until they caught their breath. "I love you."

"I love you too."

**A/N: I told you the second chapter would be much longer. Well anyway I hoped you like this chapter. Now that I've shown all this love it's time to gradually rip it apart. Muwhahaha! I am so evil.**

**There is more to come. **


	3. who are you

Logan woke up and smiled but soon frowned when he noticed the absence of warmth. He lifted his head and glanced around the room soon realizing that Kendall wasn't around. Logan shivered when he realized how cold he was. He was still naked from last night's activities and his movement is his sleep made the blanket fall off of him. This fact made Logan blush considering that at any moment anyone could walk in only to have a nice view of his pasty white butt. Logan pushed against the bed and lifted himself onto his knees. He crawled out of bed and immediately grabbed a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt.

"I didn't do it!" Logan glanced towards the door when he heard Carlos yell. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and concern and made his way to the living room.

"Who else would it be Carlos? You break everything!" Carlos was sitting on the couch while Kendall stood in front of him. James was sitting next to Carlos looking like he wasn't sure what to do. "Will you just tell me what happened? You know Logan loves this thing!"

"I don't know what happened!" Carlos threw his hands up in frustration but Kendall didn't look like he was going to back down any time soon. Logan quickly walked over to his friends and placed his hand on Kendall's back. Kendall turned around all anger fading.

"Kendall? What's going on?" Kendall sighed and held up the object for Logan to see. It was the stuffed puppy that Kendall had given Logan so many months ago. Kendall was holding the body in his left hand and the head in his right. The head had been ripped clean off and stuffing was falling all over the place. Logan took the body from Kendall and examined it. He pouted slightly. He really did like this thing. "Aw… what happened to it?" Kendall turned back to Carlos with an annoyed sigh.

"That's what I have been trying to find out."

"It wasn't me!" Logan put the body of the stuffed animal on the table and took the head from Kendall also placing that on the table.

"Kendall, did you actually see Carlos do anything to that stuffed animal?" Kendall shook his head making Logan cross his arms. "Then stop blaming him. Besides, it's only a stuffed animal and we can sew the head back on. It will be fine." Kendall sighed.

"Are you sure? I mean… I thought you would be more upset that something I gave you was ruined." Logan chuckled.

"Again it's just a stuffed animal. I still have you, "Logan glanced at his hand that still had the ring, "and I like this way more." Kendall chuckled and kissed Logan's cheek. He turned to Carlos and smiled apologetically.

"Sorry Carlos." Carlos smiled brightly at his friend. He could never hold a grudge. After a moment of silence between everyone Kendall looked at them all expectantly. "So, what's everyone doing today?" Everyone but James shrugged. He stood up smiling at his three friends.

"Well, I am going to the mall to restock on my Cuda products. Logan, Carlos, and Kendall laughed at James as he walked away. Logan thought for a moment then walked towards James room. When he got to the door James was just starting to go through his dresser.

"Hey James?" James looked up at Logan questioningly. "Can I come with you?" James smiled and nodded.

"Sure and I'll be happy to give you advice on whatever your planning to buy for Kendall." Logan smiled. James knew him to well. Logan walked back through the living room only to be stopped when Kendall wrapped his arms around his waist. Kendall kissed Logan's neck making him smile.

"Kendall I have to get dressed." Logan whined. Kendall chuckled and reluctantly pulled away.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm gunna go to the mall with James." Kendall pouted.

"You don't want to spend time with me?" Logan rolled his eyes at Kendall's over dramatically hurt tone.

"You and I both know that I can't get enough of you." Kendall smiled and leaned in to kiss Logan. Before their lips touched Logan pulled out of his grip. "But I'm gunna hang out with James today." Logan smirked; he didn't need to see Kendall's face to know he was pouting. Carlos walked behind Kendall and patted him on the back.

"You really are wiped man." Kendall turned to Carlos and glared.

"I am not… no your totally right." Carlos chuckled.

"So what are we gunna do today Kendall. The ladies are going to the mall." Kendall laughed but his laugh was short lived when both Logan and James peeked out of their rooms.

"I AM NOT A LADY!" Carlos laughed again.

"Well Logan, considering you are the girl in the relationship you are and James… do I really need to say it." Both James and Logan glared and shook their heads before retreating back to their rooms. Carlos turned to Kendall again. "So what are we doing today?"

"We could just go to the pool." Carlos nodded and walked to his room. Kendall started walking to his room but turned with a raised eyebrow when he heard a thump and a yelp.

"You still think I'm a lady now!" Another thump was heard. "I thought I was a lady Carlos you can't hit a lady!" Kendall shook his head and walked into his room. Logan was just finishing pulling on his shirt. When he spotted Kendall he glanced at him with a pout. Kendall walked over to Logan and kissed him on the cheek. Logan turned around and wrapped his arms around Kendall's neck looking up at him.

"You don't think I'm a lady right?" Logan narrowed his eyes the longer Kendall took to answer.

"No you're not a lady your just a really, really emotional boy who likes stuffed animals and kittens." Logan dropped his arms from around Kendall and glared.

"That better not have been sarcasm I detected Kendall Knight. Cause if it was don't be surprised when you suddenly find yourself going celibate." Kendall frowned.

"No, no, no! I was being serious! Your 100 percent boy! I swear!" Logan continued to glare but then smirked evilly making Kendall swallow hard.

"I don't know. I have been missing my own bed lately. Maybe I should sleep in it undisturbed for a while." Logan walked towards the bathroom with Kendall right behind him.

"What do you mean a while? Babe…? How long is a while? Logan, how long is a while?" Logan closed the bathroom door behind him without saying anything to Kendall. Kendall glared at the door when he could clearly hear Logan snickering from the other side.

"I totally am whipped."

* * *

"I hate you Carlos." Carlos squeaked and looked at Kendall confused.

"What did I do?"

"I'm in the dog house because of your lady comment." Carlos sat up from his spot on his lounge chair and smiled laughing at Kendall.

"If it was just my comment I would be the one Logan was mad at. What did you say to him?"

"I said he wasn't a girl, he is just an emotional boy who likes stuffed animals and kittens." Kendall glared at Carlos when he started laughing loudly.

"Dude, that's all you. Why would you say that? That would be like if Stephanie asked me if she was a boy and I said no your just really muscular girl who likes football and farting." Kendall grimaced.

"Stephanie isn't muscular." Carlos rolled his eyes.

"Yea and she doesn't like football or fart either. It was just an example. Anyway Logan probably thought you were teasing him. But don't worry he probably isn't mad at you." Kendall sighed.

"I know he isn't mad at me but he said I might find myself celibate." Carlos furrowed his eyebrows.

"What does that mean?" Kendall sighed again.

"It basically means you don't have sex." Carlos grimaced and reached over patting Kendall on the shoulder.

"Sucks for you dude." Carlos and Kendall fell into a comfortable silence for a while. They both seemed to be lost in their own thoughts until Carlos broke out of his and turned to Kendall. "Hey Kendall?"

"Hmm?" Carlos bit his lip making Kendall open his eyes from the silence. "What is it Carlos?"

"How do you know when you found the one? What's it like?" Kendall thought for a moment.

"Well they become the air you breathe. You would do absolutely anything for them no matter what that could mean. You would risk yourself for them because their happiness and safety is the most important thing in the world." Carlos nodded and seemed to drift back into his thoughts. "Is something bothering you Carlos?" Carlos sighed and sat up Indian style on the lounge chair.

"It's Stephanie." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows.

"Are you guys having problems? I thought you liked Stephanie?" Carlos sighed and nodded.

"I do but I don't know if she likes me like I like her. I mean she has a lot of guy friends and I know what your thinking, 'Carlos your being Jealous," Kendall raised an eyebrow at Carlos' attempt at mimicking him but he remained silent so Carlos could continue. "But it's not just that. I think she's been flirting with them a lot and she always wants to do it. I mean, I had fun on our date last night but she just kept coming on to me the whole time and I'm starting to think I'm just like… I don't know."

"A fuck buddy?" Carlos blinked a couple of times a Kendall.

"I guess so. How do you know your relationship with Logan is about more than just sex?"

"That's easy because we absolutely love each other and we make love so we can be connected in an intimate way. There is a difference between making loving and having sex. If you can't see the difference then it isn't love." Carlos thought about it for a moment then bit his lip. He turned to Kendall with tears welling up in his eyes.

"I don't think its love." Kendall moved and sat next to Carlos draping his arm over his shoulders.

"I'm sorry Carlos. I'm sure you'll find the right person. In the mean time, what are you going to do about Stephanie?" Carlos sighed and shrugged.

"Well I'm going to see her tomorrow. I should probably talk to her then… and break it off." Kendall nodded and gave Carlos' shoulder a reassuring squeeze.

"I'm sure it's for the best."

* * *

"James are you almost done." James turned to Logan and looked at him like he had five heads.

"Almost done? Are you insane! I still have to figure out what gel to buy."

"But you have been looking at the same gel for an hour!" James rolled his eyes at Logan.

"I have to make sure I get the perfect product." Logan sighed heavily.

"Why don't you get one of each, if you don't like one don't buy it again." James thought about it for a moment then took three bottles of gel off of the shelf. Logan smiled as James started walking towards the cashier.

"Hey they have more Cuda man spray!" Logan groaned and shuffled his feet as he followed James to the other side of the store. After spending another hour in the same store Logan dragged James out once he was done paying.

"After this I am never going to the mall with you again." James rolled his eyes.

"Oh come on it wasn't that bad." Logan narrowed his eyes and shook his head. Once they reached the jewelry store he decided to drop the matter. Logan looked through the window looking over every piece of jewelry. He started gnawing on his lip nervously when he realized he had no idea what he wanted to get Kendall. What would Kendall like? What if he got him something he hated? James noticed Logan's apprehension and grabbed him pulling him into the store. "Don't over analyze it Logan, just get something that you think will mean something." Logan nodded at James and started looking over everything. He could rule out earrings and he didn't think Kendall would want a necklace. That only left the rings. Logan looked down at his own ring. He wanted it to be different from his but still show the same love and devotion that his ring showed. Logan spotted a silver ring towards the back that he liked.

"Excuse me?" The jeweler looked at Logan and smiled. "Can I see that one please?" They nodded and took the ring out and handed it to Logan. James was looking at the ring from over Logan's shoulder.

"Are you sure about that one Logie? It looks kind of… plain." The jeweler scoffed making Logan and James look up at him.

"My good man that ring is anything but plain. It may look like nothing special but watch this." The man took the ring and held it under a desk lamp on the counter. Logan and James' eyes widened in amazement as the ring sparkled beautifully under the light. It was like diamonds were covering it.

**(A/N: I couldn't help but think of Edward Cullen her. Twilight reference was not intended! Lol)**

"It's beautiful." The man nodded and smiled at Logan.

"If you think that's cool just image how it looks in the sun light. You'd be making a good choice by picking this ring. Most people don't notice it because it's so plain, they don't see the beauty lying just under the surface." Logan smiled. He knew for a fact now that he had to get that ring. This ring would be a piece of himself that was always with Kendall. Logan was just a plain ring that everyone over looked but Kendall was able to see that something special was just under the surface.

"I'll take it." The man smiled and nodded. "Is there a chance I can get it engraved?" The man nodded again.

"Yea, normal it would take about a week because there are other rings that need to be engraved as well but I think I can push this to the front. You seem like a nice kid so come back in five hours." Logan smiled brightly and thanked him. He gave him a piece of paper with what he wanted engraved on the ring and left with James.

"See Logie you did fine. Kendall will love that ring."

"You think so?" James smiled and patted Logan on the back.

"I know so. Now, what are we gunna do for the next five hours." Logan shrugged.

"I don't know we could always…"

"Oh my god! They're having a sale on bandanas!" James ran into the store leaving Logan by himself. Logan sighed and walked into the store dragging his feet.

"We could always do that…"

* * *

After spending a few more hours by the pool Kendall and Carlos finally decided to go back inside. James and Logan would probably be home soon so they figured they should start heading back to 2J.

"Hey devil boy." Kendall turned to see Mr. Bitters waving him over. He rolled his eyes and walked over with Carlos behind him.

"What did we do now?" He didn't feel like getting yelled at today.

"Nothing, you got a message," Mr. Bitters handed a piece of paper to Kendall. "Now go away I'm busy." Mr. Bitters leaned back in the chair he was sitting in and began to take a nap. Kendall and Carlos gave each other a look before walking towards their apartment again. Kendall waited until he was inside the apartment to start to read the message.

_Kendall,_

_Meet me at the recording studio. We have something important to discuss. Come at 5pm._

Kendall glanced at the clock and noticed it was 4:20. He sighed and ran to his room so he could get dressed quickly. It would take him a while to get to the recording studio and he didn't need Gustavo yelling at him for being late. Once Kendall was done getting ready he made his way out of the apartment.

"Hey Carlos I have to go to Rocque records. Tell Logan I'll be back soon." Kendall faintly heard Carlos mutter an "ok" before he shut the door.

It didn't take long for Kendall to get to Rocque records. He still had ten minutes to spare and he was just making his way through the parking lot. "This better be important Gustavo." Kendall huffed and reached for the door.

"Kendall…" Kendall snapped his head to the side and looked around. He didn't see anyone. He slowly walked over and peeked into an ally.

"Hello?"

"Over here Kendall." Kendall walked so he was in full view.

"Gustavo is that… who are you?"

**A/N: END OF CHAPTER! Who could it be! Gustavo? Kelly? AN ALIEN! **

**Yes, you know what I'm gunna spoil it right now… an alien is in the ally waiting for Kendall *cough* NO! *cough***

**Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'm not gunna say much but something in this chapter is very important. So go back and read maybe you'll be able to get an idea to what's coming. =]**

**There is more to come.**


	4. can I really

When James and Logan returned to the Palm Woods it was late. Because they had to wait for the ring to be finished before they could leave the mall they didn't get home until after 8 o'clock. When they walked in Mrs. Knight was already serving dinner to Katie and Carlos. Logan furrowed his eyebrows and looked around.

"Hey, where's Kendall?" Carlos held a finger up signaling for Logan to give him a minute to finish chewing. He swallowed and wiped his mouth.

"He got a message from Gustavo or Kelly asking him to go to the recording studio. He didn't say what it was for but he said to tell you he would be back soon."

"Ok… when did he leave?" Carlos thought about it for a moment.

"I think it was like 4:30?" Logan bit his lip and looked at the clock nervously.

"4:30? Hasn't he been gone a little long?" James placed his hand on Logan's shoulder giving him a reassuring look.

"Don't worry he will be home soon. Whatever Gustavo wanted to talk to Kendall about is probably important. And Kendall probably made a stop or two on his way home." Logan nodded at James but he still couldn't get rid of the uneasiness in the pit of his stomach. As he sat down he pulled a velvet box out of his pocket and opened it. Inside was the silver ring with the inscription "I'll love you always and forever." Logan smiled to himself and placed the ring back in his pocket. He couldn't wait to give it to Kendall.

* * *

"Who are you?" Kendall squinted trying to make the figure in the shadows more visible. They were too small to be Gustavo but it wasn't Kelly either. He thought he recognized the voice but he wasn't sure. They sounded kind of… pained.

"I think you know me very well Kendall Knight." Kendall stepped back because of the harsh tone of their voice. He bald up his hands and clenched his jaw.

"Enough! Who are you?" The figure stepped forward into the light. Kendall paled. He brought up his shaking hands and rubbed his eyes only to realize he wasn't seeing an illusion. No, he was seeing a ghost. "How?"

"Do you know what I went through Kendall? To be stuck in a coma for months only to wake up in a casket. Do you know what it feels like for everyone around you to be so fucking stupid that they don't realize you're not actually dead! DO YOU!" Kendall tensed and took another step back. Why was he afraid?

"This doesn't make any sense! You were dead Ryan! I saw you! You weren't breathing!" Ryan shrugged and winced slightly.

"From what I gather the coma left me with low heart rate and brain function. When the EMT's looked me over they assumed I was dead. But after months and months my brain functions and heart rate increased." Ryan laughed and smirked. "It's a good thing my parents waited to bury me. It would have sucked waking up six feet under." Kendall growled at Ryan.

"Why won't you just fucking die?" Ryan shrugged again mockingly.

"I don't know Kendall. I could ask you the same question. You know it was hard to find a hospital far enough so I could get treated for my injuries. Having a bullet inside you for months isn't good. I'm still in a little pain but my pain is nothing compared to what I'm going to do to Logan." Ryan smirked. Kendall's eyes darkened and all fear was washed away. He lunged at Ryan and threw him against the wall.

"You. Wont. Touch. Him." Kendall hissed out. Kendall grew even more enraged because Ryan only laughed at him. Ryan forced Kendall off of him making Kendall stumble back a few feet.

"Don't worry Kendall. I won't do anything to Logan… as long as you do what I say." Kendall narrowed his eyes.

"What the fuck makes you think I would listen to you?" Ryan chuckled and began to walk around Kendall.

"Well for starters if you don't do what I say, "Ryan stopped walking when he was in front of Kendall again, "I will kill him. Actually I will fuck him, and then kill him." Kendall growled.

"You're not gunna get anywhere near him. I promise you that." Ryan smirked widely.

"But I've already been near Logan. He looked so cute lying naked on his bed last night. His skin is so soft. You know, he smiled in his sleep when I touched him… maybe he thought it was you. Also, I didn't leave without leaving a message." Kendall eyes widened and he thought back to the previous morning.

_Kendall's eyes fluttered open and he smiled when he noticed Logan was cuddled up to his side. He kissed Logan on the cheek then glanced towards the clock to see what time it was. Kendall frowned when he spotted the stuffed puppy he had given Logan on the nightstand headless. Kendall quietly climbed out of bed and picked it up. He cursed to himself and threw on some cloths. He took the stuffed animal with him intending on confronting Carlos._

"You bastard! How the hell did you get into our apartment?" Ryan chuckled.

"I have my ways. But anyway if you don't do what I say, Logan will end up just like that stuffed dog." Kendall clenched his jaw. Ryan had gotten to them so easily. He could have done something then, he could have hurt Logan then. The thought that he was near Logan and even touched him killed Kendall inside. He couldn't no, wouldn't let Ryan get to him.

"What do you want?" Ryan smiled.

"Well, for the amount of suffering I went through death just wouldn't be enough so… I'm going to make you both suffer ten times over. You are going to break up with him." Kendall's eyes widened.

"What!" He hissed out.

"Yep, break it off or I kill him. After you do that you will not acknowledge him, comfort him, or show any form of love or friendship towards him. As far as you're concerned he means nothing to you." Kendall scoffed.

"He's not stupid he won't believe it. He knows I love him and that I will always care for him."

"Then make him believe you. Remember Kendall, do this or he dies." Kendall took a step towards Ryan.

"Why should I! I could get rid of you right now! End it right here!" Ryan smirked.

"You want to end it here… fine!" Before Kendall knew it a gun was sitting right between his eyes. He swallowed hard as he strained his eyes trying to look at the gun. Ryan smirked. "Well Kendall, do we have a deal?" Kendall stayed silent for a long moment.

"Fine." Ryan took the gun away from Kendall's head. He glanced at his cell phone then back to Kendall.

"Well it's about 8 now. You have a lot to do so you should get going." Ryan was smiling as he walked away. Before he was too far he shouted back to Kendall. "Make sure you don't tell anyone about our little meeting. I'm sure you wouldn't want to find out what will happen and remember, I'll be watching!" Kendall cursed to himself and kicked the wall of the building. How could he do this? How could he hurt Logan like that? Kendall placed his hands on the wall and took a deep breath. Whether he could or couldn't he had to do it. He couldn't let Ryan get to Logan. He wasn't going to let Logan die. He knew this was going to hurt Logan more than anything but he had to protect him. Even if that meant he would have to break his heart.

* * *

Logan was pacing the living room as he chewed on his finger nails. It was already 1 o'clock and Kendall still wasn't back yet. Logan had tried to call Kendall's cell phone a dozen times but he wouldn't pick up. Logan felt a sting of tears as the worst possible scenarios came to his mind. What if he was hit by a car? Or mugged? Or shot? Or lying in an ally with stab wounds? Logan started to hyperventilate as he glanced at the clock once more. Mrs. Knight and Katie had gone to bed already but James and Carlos were still awake and sitting on the couch. When Logan started hyperventilating they both stood up. James grabbed Logan by his arms making him stop moving.

"Logan stop scaring yourself. I'm sure he is fine."

"F-fine… fine! He's been gone for hours! He hasn't called or texted or done anything to let us know where he is! For all we know he could be in a ditch dying or something!" Logan ripped himself from James' grasped and began pacing again. Carlos and James glanced at each other but everyone stopped what they were doing when Logan's cell phone began to ring. Logan ran over and sighed with relief when he noticed the caller ID was Kendall.

"Kendall!"

"Hey Logie." Logan sighed but then became angry.

"Do you know what time it is? Where the hell are you! You haven't called or answered my calls! Do you realize how worried I was? I was afraid you were in some ally dying or something." Kendall sighed when he heard Logan sniffing.

"I'm sorry Logan. I'm still at the recording studio. Gustavo needed me to… rerecord my part of one of our songs. Listen because it's so late I'm going to spend the night here." Logan furrowed his eye brows.

"Stay there? You can't stay there! I'll come and get you."

"No! No… don't worry about it Gustavo… has like a bedroom hidden here. He stays here sometimes when… he uh… writes his songs." Logan set his lip in a line. Something was off with Kendall.

"Ok… I'll see you tomorrow then…" Kendall hung up without saying goodbye. Logan sighed and closed his phone.

"Well… is he ok?" James stared at Logan expectantly but he wasn't answering. "Logan?"

"He's fine." Logan started walking towards his room. He had a bad feeling but he didn't want to think about it.

* * *

Kendall crossed his arms over his chest trying to keep warm. The park was disserted but he was fine with that. He looked up towards the Palm Woods and sighed. He couldn't get himself to go in there yet. He couldn't face Logan yet. Kendall sat down on a bench and then laid down on it. He sighed and closed his eyes. He was dreading tomorrow.

**A/N: so… do you still hate Kendall? He's only going to hurt Logan because he loves him! Yea… that makes total sense. Anyway I hope you enjoyed this chapter. The next chapter will catch up with the preface and you will be able to see what happens with that. And if you still don't know what was so important in the last chapter well Kendall says,**

"You would do absolutely anything for them no matter **what that could mean****.** You would risk yourself for them because their happiness and**safety is the most important** thing in the world."

**So basically it shows that Kendall is willing to do anything for Logan no matter what that may be. It foreshadowed that Kendall is willing to break Logan's heart to protect him. Anyway**

**There is more to come.**


	5. how can you watch my world crash down

"Kendall?" Kendall moaned then yelped when he found himself landing harshly on the cold ground. He rolled onto his back and blinked a couple of times before he realized the person who had called his name was Jo. "Kendall, what are you doing sleeping out here?" Kendall stood up and fixed himself. He looked around noticing it was bright out.

"What time is it?" Jo looked at her watch.

"Almost 10. Now can you answer my question? Why were you sleeping outside?" Kendall sighed. He couldn't tell Jo the truth.

"I went for a walk earlier this morning to clear me head. When I sat down to take a break I must have fallen asleep. It's uh… been a long week." Jo seemed to believe Kendall's lie. She simply nodded her head seeming to understand.

"Is everything ok Kendall? You look terrible." Kendall looked down at his shirt noticing some stains on it from lying on the bench. He should expect to look like crap, he did sleep outside.

"Yea I'm fine. Did you happen to see Logan at all this morning?" Jo nodded her head.

"Yea, I saw him a couple minutes ago going to the pool with James and Carlos. He looked a little nervous… is he ok?"

"Yea… he's fine. Well I better go." Before Jo could say anymore Kendall jogged towards the lobby. He peeked inside and didn't spot any of his friends. He ran to the stairs and ran up them intent on cleaning himself up. He didn't want it to look like he had been sleeping outside. Logan was smart, he would get suspicious. When Kendall got to the apartment he sighed with relief. No one was there so he would be able to have some more time to himself. The first thing Kendall did was take a shower. He must have been there for at least an hour. It was enough time for the water to get cold. After that Kendall got dressed, washed his face and brushed his teeth. Kendall looked himself over in the bathroom mirror. How was he going to break Logan's heart without breaking his own? Kendall sighed but gasped when he heard the front door to the apartment open. He swallowed hard and slowly walked to the living room.

"Kendall!" Kendall sighed with relief. It was only James and Carlos. Before they could hammer Kendall with questions he stuck his hands out.

"Where's Logan?" James and Carlos gave each other a look.

"He's still by the pool. Dude he was freaking out last night. Where the hell were you?"

"Don't worry about it Carlos." Without saying anything else Kendall made his way out of the apartment. When he was down in the lobby he stopped in his tracks noticing Logan walking towards him. Kendall shut his eyes and took in a breath trying to put on his best indifferent face. "I hope this works." When Logan spotted Kendall he smiled and jogged over to him. He wrapped his arms around his neck and kissed him quickly before pulling away. Kendall didn't miss the uncertain look Logan gave him when Kendall didn't hug back.

"Kendall, I want to give you something." Logan pulled Kendall towards the Palm Woods Park wanting to get some privacy. He couldn't help but feel like something was off with Kendall. It probably had to do with going to the recording studio. Gustavo probably spent the whole time yelling at him. When they were in a secluded area Logan turned so he was facing Kendall.

"Logie…" Logan put his hand up stopping Kendall from saying anything else.

"Don't worry I'm not mad at you. I um… I got you something." Logan pulled out the velvet box and opened it. Kendall just wanted to cry. Logan took the ring out of the box and held it up for Kendall to see. "I know it looks plain but look. "Logan held it up to the light allowing it to sparkle. Kendall heart broke when he noticed what was engraved on the inside of it. Kendall sighed and took the ring from Logan and put it back in the box. Logan frowned as he watched Kendall close the box. "You don't like it?" Kendall wanted to scream when he heard the hurt in Logan's voice.

"It's not that Logan. We need to talk." Logan nodded slowly. Kendall sighed and closed his eyes. "I want to break up." Kendall flinched when he heard Logan gasped. At that moment Kendall knew he couldn't do this. He couldn't hurt Logan.

"_Do it or I'll kill him."_

Kendall tensed at the memory of Ryan's words. His eyes darkened and his expression changed to emotionless. He had to do this. He opened his eyes and noticed Logan had stepped back a few feet. Logan stared at Kendall wide eyed. He couldn't have heard him right. Did he really just say that? "Y-you what…?"

"I said I don't want to be with you." Logan felt tears come to his eyes and fall down his cheeks. He looked around for a second then let his eyes fall back on Kendall. His eyes widened more when he noticed Kendall's emotionless expression. This wasn't a joke.

"B-but you… you said… you're supposed to…You're lying!" Logan bald up his fist and clenched his jaw. Kendall continued to stare at Logan with apathy.

"I'm not." The longer Logan looked at Kendall the angrier he got. This couldn't be happening it wasn't possible. Logan stepped forward closing the distance between himself and Kendall.

"Yes you are!" Logan could feel tears of anger running down his face. "You said… you said you loved me! You said I was b-beautiful! I know you meant it! Stop lying to me! You meant it!"

"No I didn't… I felt sorry for you so I humored you." Kendall narrowed his eyes at Logan as he took another step forward.

"b-but all those times we… you felt something I know you did! You mad loved to me it was special…"

"No it wasn't I just wanted to get something out of this." Logan widened his eyes in horror. He stepped forward again so he was inches from Kendall. Kendall didn't move and just stared down at him. Logan grabbed onto Kendall's shirt roughly and started shaking him.

"STOP LYING! Please just stop! You don't mean that you can't mean that! I love you Kendall!" Kendall ripped Logan's hand off his shirt and pushed him. Logan stumbled a little but regained his balance. He stared at Kendall shocked for a moment then became angry again. Logan moved back over to Kendall and started banging on his chest with his fists. Kendall pushed Logan again but he didn't stop.

"Stop it Logan."

"Not until you tell me the truth!" Kendall pushed Logan again but he continued to ignore him.

"Stop!"

"I said no!"

"God Dam it stop!" Kendall pushed Logan and punched him in the jaw. Logan fell onto his back and sat up slowly, shocked. He brought his hand up to his face and touched the area. Logan pulled his hand back and noticed some blood on his fingers. Logan stared up at Kendall with wide eyes; there was no remorse in his expression. All the anger Logan had felt washed away. Out of all the people in the world Kendall was the last person Logan expected to hit him. Logan's brow furrowed and his lip quivered. His body began to shake as an endless stream of tears fell down his face. Logan let out a loud sob but Kendall didn't move to comfort him. He stayed in his spot watching Logan fall to pieces. Logan rolled over onto his hands and knees and slowly stood up. He glanced at Kendall before he ran back towards the Palm Woods. Kendall let out a sigh as he watched Logan run away from him. If it were any other time Kendall would be the one to comfort him. But not this time, this time Kendall was the one who destroyed him.

Kendall felt the sting of tears come to his eyes. He felt like he was dying inside. Kendall wiped his eyes and took in a shaky breath. He couldn't cry. He had to keep up the act. As far as anyone was concerned Kendall didn't care about Logan. The thought made Kendall let out one stray tear. He sighed heavily and wiped it away.

* * *

Logan ran into the lobby and ran for the stairs. He tripped a couple times because his tears were blurring his vision. When he made it to his floor he briskly walked to apartment 2J keeping his eyes to the floor and his arms wrapped around his middle in a desperate attempt to keep himself together. Logan slowly walked into 2J and slowly closed the door. When it was fully closed he leaned his head against it. A small sob escaped his lips and alerted James and Carlos who were still in the apartment. Logan turned around and started walking towards his room but he was stopped by Carlos who grabbed his arm. "Logan? What's wrong? What happened?" Logan shook his head and tried to pull his arm out of Carlos' grip.

"Let go of me Carlos." Logan let out another sob when Carlos didn't slacken his hold. Logan went to grab Carlos' hand and forcefully remove his grip but James grabbed his wrist.

"Tell us what happened Logan." Logan shook his head.

"I don't want to talk about it just let me go!" The three boys turned when they heard the apartment door open. Kendall walked in keeping his eyes to the ground. James and Carlos relaxed but Logan just let out another sob. Kendall lifted his eyes to Logan, who was pleading with him. Logan's eyes were begging for Kendall to hug him and tell him it was all just a misunderstanding. Kendall dropped his gaze from Logan and walked past the three boys to his room. James and Carlos dropped their grips from Logan completely shocked. Logan let out a sob as Kendall entered their room and shut the door. Logan used his new freedom and ran to the kitchen bathroom, locking himself inside.

"What the hell?" Carlos couldn't believe his eyes. Did Kendall really just do that? Before Carlos could run to Kendall and Logan's room James stopped him.

"We'll worry about Kendall later." James turned his attention to the direction of Logan's loud sobs. Carlos nodded and jogged over to the bathroom door with James. "Logan open the door." James banged on the door but Logan showed no sign of coming out.

* * *

Logan was sitting in the bathroom across from the toilet with his knees pulled to his chest. He was so lost and confused. He didn't know what to think. He loved Kendall with all his heart. Logan tried to think back but couldn't find any indications that Kendall had never loved him. Logan wrapped his arms around his head and continued to sob.

"_You can trust me Logan, I would NEVER hurt you."_

"_I said I don't want to be with you."_

_"Logan, I love you."_

"_I want to break up."_

"_You're still the same amazing guy that I love."_

"_No I didn't… I felt sorry for you so I humored you."_

_"Logan, I did all those things for you because I love you."_

"_No it wasn't I just wanted to get something out of this."_

_"Logan you are beautiful. You're the most beautiful person in the world, inside and out. _

"_I'm not lying."_

_"I love you so much Logan. I will never want anyone other then you. You're my world."_

_"I love you more than anything."_

_I love you so much."_

_"I love you."_

Logan let out a scream. All the contradicting thoughts were driving him insane. Nothing made sense anymore and he could feel his world crashing all around him. Logan gripped his hair and let out another scream which turned into a loud sob. He couldn't imagine not being with Kendall. It scared him and it hurt too much. Logan began to breathe erratically. He felt like the room was getting smaller and smaller. The room closed in on him and he couldn't breathe. He let out another sob/scream before he felt something bubbling from the pit of his stomach. Logan covered his mouth as a he was hit with a wave of nausea. He scrambled to the toilet and lifted the lid in just enough time to begin to violently vomit. Logan's throat burned and his body ached from the force of his retching. He let out another sob before he threw up even more. Logan barely registered the noise of the bathroom door swinging open loudly and two people joining him. He didn't need to be looking to know it was Carlos and James. Logan leaned against the toilet and buried his face in his arms. The thought that James and Carlos were coming to comfort him instead of Kendall made his heart ache even more. Logan coughed barley able to breathe because of his vomiting. He soon found that he was coughing, sobbing, and gasping for breath.

"Carlos go get Logan's inhaler." Logan heard the sound of the toilet flushing and someone leaving the room. James pulled Logan away from the toilet and grabbed a dish cloth so he could wipe Logan's mouth. When Carlos came back he placed Logan's inhaler in his mouth and pressed on the button. After a few moments Logan found breathing easier but that didn't stop him from continuing to sob. James wrapped his arms around Logan and pulled him to his chest. Carlos joined the hug and they both rocked Logan and allowed him to cling to them. After a while Logan's sobs quieted down but his tears didn't stop falling. He pulled away from James and Carlos, his breath hick-upping a few times before he spoke.

"I-I'm so confused. I thought he l-loved me." Carlos put his hand on Logan's shoulder and gave him a reassuring smile.

"Of course he does Logan. Why would you think he doesn't?" Logan pointed in the direction of his and Kendall's room.

"Because he broke up with me! That's why!" Logan brought his knees up to his chest and buried his face in them. James and Carlos looked at each other wide eyed.

"What?" James lifted Logan's chin so they would make eye contact. "Logan, what happened?"

"I-I don't know! I don't know what I did. I tried to give him the ring but he wouldn't take it! And then he said…" Logan bit back a sob before continuing. "He said he never loved me! That doesn't make any sense. He… all those times… I DON'T GET IT!" Carlos pulled Logan into another hug once he started sobbing again.

"Don't worry Logan we'll figure this out." Logan pulled away from Carlos to look up at him.

"How? He won't even talk to me!" Carlos sighed and patted Logan's shoulder.

"Don't worry buddy. We're here for you." Logan couldn't even attempt to force a smile at Carlos' words. He looked down and wiped his nose with his hand.

"Logan? What happened to your face?" James lifted Logan's head by his chin and tilted it. There was a scratch with dried blood around it and an ugly bruise was starting to form. Logan pulled his face from James grasp and started shaking. He looked up at James and Carlos again and let out a sob.

"H-he hit me." Carlos and James were pissed. Once they could get Logan back under control they would have to have a discussion with Kendall. After all the stuff Logan went through with Ryan how could he even think about hitting him? Carlos lifted Logan up off the floor and walked him out of the bathroom.

"Logie you should get some rest." Logan whimpered and tried to pull out of Carlos' grasp.

"I can't go in there Carlos. I can't see him." Carlos nodded and brought Logan into his and James' room.

"You can sleep on my bed." Logan nodded and lay down on Carlos bed. After a few minutes he drifted off into an un-peaceful sleep. James and Carlos sighed before quietly leaving the room. James' face soon turned angry as he started to walk towards Kendall and Logan's room.

"I want some answers."

**A/N: DONE! Well there we go. The story has finally caught up with the preface. Now to see what happens next…**

**The quotes in italics were random quotes from Silent Crys for Salvation and from chapter 2 of Silent Crys for Deliverance and also ones that were obviously from earlier in this chapter and the preface.**

**There is more to come.**


	6. losing the mask

Kendall closed the door and leaned against it. He could hear Logan's loud sobbing and it was taking all of his control not to run back out there and embrace him. Kendall shut his eyes and gripped the doorknob. He could hear the metal rubbing against the wood of the door as his hand shook. Kendall ripped himself away from the door and pulled open the draw of the nightstand. He rummaged through it and grabbed his iPod. He turned it on and blasted the music sighing with relief when Logan's sobbing could no longer be heard. Kendall laid down on his bed and folded his arms behind his head. He stared blankly at the ceiling as his vision began to blur. Kendall let out one quiet sob before he smacked himself hard on the face in order to gain back his composure. Kendall sighed as he rubbed his cheek. Before he knew it he had drifted off into an un-peaceful sleep.

* * *

Kendall suddenly felt his pillow being yanked from under his head and smacking him in the face. He held up his hands still half asleep as he was smacked again. Kendall winced when his ear buds were ripped out of his ears. He opened his eyes to find James and Carlos looming over him. James was still gripping onto his ear buds while Carlos held up the pillow ready to hit him again.

"Do you want to explain to me what the FUCK your problem is?" James threw down Kendall's ear buds it taking his iPod down with them. Kendall glanced down for a second then looked back up at James and Carlos.

"There's nothing to tell." James scoffed.

"Nothing to tell! Of course there is something to tell Kendall! Carlos and I just spend the last few hours with Logan who is beyond upset. Why the hell did you break up with him! Carlos and I know for a fact you love him."

"No I-"

"Don't even finish that sentence Kendall Knight because you and I both know its bullshit!" Kendall sighed. It was going to be harder to get James and Carlos off his back. Logan was the emotional one so he would just run away and cry but James and Carlos liked to get in your face.

"Whatever was between Logan and I you can forget. I don't care about him." James shook his head.

"You're disgusting." James stormed out of the room. Kendall let out another sigh and then looked to Carlos.

"What do you have to say?" Carlos lowered the pillow and to Kendall's surprise he looked sad.

"You're my best friend Kendall but this is ridiculous. I don't know why you're doing this but Logan loves you. He always will love you. How could you hurt him like that? You hit him. I used to look up to you. I'm not so sure I want to do that anymore." Carlos dropped Kendall's pillow back on his bed and left the room. Kendall ran his fingers through his hair. He didn't know what was worse the fact the James hated him or the fact that Carlos was disappointed in him. Kendall plopped back down on his bed and let out a long sigh. It wasn't late but he didn't plan on getting up any time soon. Kendall rolled over to his side facing the wall. He closed his eyes and let himself once again drift off into sleep.

* * *

Logan slowly opened his eyes. He didn't need a reminder of what happened the previous day. He didn't wonder why he was on Carlos' bed while Carlos was squished on James bed with James. Normally he would have thought it was funny. He would have ran to get Kendall so they could take a picture of James and Carlos spooning then wake them up so they can watch their reactions. Unfortunately, it wasn't funny. Nothing was funny. Logan felt numb. Tears started streaming down his face again and he turned his head into his pillow to muffle the sobs. He was gripping the pillow so tightly to his face that he couldn't breathe but he didn't care. If he was to die right now while trying to quiet his sobs it wouldn't bother him. Logan vaguely heard Carlos and James wake up. He didn't both to watch them to see how they react. He thought he heard Carlos say, "This never happened." But he wasn't sure. He couldn't hear past the pounding in his head. Logan felt the pillow being ripped from his face and he took a deep stuttering breath. "Logan, what the hell were you doing?" Logan kept his eyes down.

"N-nothing…" James sat down next to Logan and lifted his chin up forcing him to look up.

"That didn't look like nothing. To me it looked like you were trying to smother yourself with your pillow." Logan ripped his face from James grasp and stared at the floor again.

"What if I was…" Logan whispered. James and Carlos gave each other a look. They didn't here most of that.

"Excuse me?" Logan looked up to Carlos with anger in his eyes.

"What if I was? Why would it matter?"

"Logan… of course it matters! You can't kill yourself. You would be leaving so much behind!" Logan scoffed.

"What the hell would I leave behind? My mother's dead, my father's dead, and now Kendall wants nothing to do with me! There is nothing left for me!"

"But what about us. Carlos and I are you best friends Logan and what about Jo and Stephanie and Camille and Katie and Mrs. Knight and mine and Carlos' parents. They all care about you Logan you still have people who care about you." Logan stood up from the bed and walked a few feet away. He turned around still angry.

"How do I know that's true? My mom never cared about me, when I went out with Ryan he never cared about me, and after thinking for a full year that Kendall loved me I find out he never cared either!" Logan scoffed. "I bet my dad didn't care either he just died before he could say it. How do I know it's not the same for you? How do I know you're not lying too?" No one's ever loved me WHY SHOULD I THINK THAT ANYONE STIL AROUND DOES!" Carlos silent got up from his bed and walked over to Logan. Logan took a step back. He thought Carlos was going to hit him. Just like Kendall did. "Stay away from me." Carlos closed the gap quickly making whimper in fear. Carlos pulled Logan into a hug and held on to him while he shook with fear.

"I'm not going to hurt you Logan. I would never hurt you."

"_You can trust me Logan, I would NEVER hurt you."_

Logan wrapped his arms around Carlos's neck and began sobbing into his shoulder. Carlos thought that Logan trusted him again but he was really crying because he said just what Kendall had said to him. When Logan stopped crying again he pulled away from Carlos. "We have to be at Rocque records today… we should probably get ready." Logan went to leave but Carlos grabbed his arm.

"Logan you don't have to go. No one is forcing you. You can stay here if you want to." Logan shook his head.

"I don't want to be alone." Carlos sighed and nodded letting Logan leave the room. When Logan walked a few feet he stopped realizing he needed to get ready to go. He stared at the door to his room to afraid to go in. Logan sighed and walked back over to James and Carlos' room. He peeked his head in and hid most of his body behind the door frame. Carlos had gone into the bathroom and James was standing at his dresser facing away from Logan. "James?" James turned around when he heard Logan calling him quietly. He walked over to Logan who was gripping on the frame of the door.

"What's wrong Logan?" Logan kept his eyes on the floor and shifted uncomfortable on his feet.

"I need… my… um… could you…" Logan was glancing back towards his room while he spoke. James seemed to get the message and ruffled Logan's hair while he walked passed him. Logan watched as James walked into his and Kendall's room. He heard a loud thump and a groan of pain before he heard James' voice.

"Get up ass wipe we need to be at the recording studio in 20 minutes." Logan frowned. James was being mean to Kendall and he didn't like it. He still loved him. James walked out a minute later with Logan's clothes. He also had Logan's shampoo, conditioner, toothbrush, and toothpaste. He handed them to Logan and gave him a sad smile. "Here."

"Thanks… James… please don't be mean to him." James frowned and let out a sigh. He nodded making Logan give him a sad smile. Logan walked over to the kitchen bathroom and placed all his things on the counter. He took off his shirt then his pants, stopping when he heard something hit the floor. Logan sighed and picked it up. It was the ring Logan was going to give to Kendall. Looking at the ring reminded him that he was still wearing the ring Kendall gave him. He sighed and went to take it off but once he put his fingers on it he stopped. He couldn't wear the ring anymore but he didn't want to take it off. Logan dropped his hand and rummaged through the sink draw. He pulled out a chain then put both rings on it. He put it around his neck then sighed sadly when he looked at himself through the mirror. He couldn't let go of Kendall yet and he hated that he had to hide that. Logan looked away from the mirror and finished getting ready.

* * *

The ride to the recording studio was quiet. Kendall refused to look at Logan and James and Carlos refused to talk to him. Logan sat between Carlos and James mostly keeping to himself. When they walked inside they lined up like they usually did except Kendall made sure to stand a few extra feet from his three friends. After a minute Gustavo and Kelly walked in.

"Ok dogs! It's time…" He stopped talking and looked to each boy. James and Carlos were still glaring at Kendall, Kendall looked completely void of emotion, and Logan just looked down right depressed. "Did I miss something?" Gustavo turned to Kelly who shrugged her shoulders. She turned to the four boys looking extremely concerned.

"Is there something going on… Kendall?" Kendall let out a sigh.

"It's not important." James and Carlos intensified their glares when Kendall's words made Logan flinch. Carlos put a hand on Logan's back rubbing it reassuringly. Kelly stayed put for a moment but sighed and turned to leave. The four boys walked into the recording booth. Kendall walking in first and Logan walking in last.

"Ok boys let's begin." It was obvious that Gustavo's was letting his concern show. He didn't even notice when he didn't refer to them as dogs. After being in the recording booth for a long time Gustavo let them out to go to dance rehearsal. The tension in such a small space was escalating and Gustavo and Kelly didn't want a fight to break out. They didn't know what was going on but they could tell it had to do with Kendall, James, and Carlos. "Ok! You are going to start with the dance for Till I forget About you." Carlos and James grimaced and glanced at Logan who seemed to be spacing out. They both gave each other worried looks before turning their attention back to Gustavo. They missed the end of his rant but they were able to get the basic idea. When Mr. X finally joined them they turned on the music and began.

* * *

The four boys spent most of their time practicing the dance. The exercise seemed to keep all their emotions in check but also the feud between all of them was messing with their dancing. They messed up constantly and Gustavo was getting frustrated. Logan seemed to be messing up the most and if it seemed like Gustavo was about to yell at him Kelly would whack him in the shoulder. She knew something was wrong with him. Logan tried his best to avoid looking at Kendall. He hadn't looked at Kendall since yesterday and he knew he wouldn't be able to stand it. He kept his eyes on the ground which caused him to constantly bump into James or Carlos, who were too focused on glaring at Kendall to notice. Kendall tried his best to stay as far away from his three friends as possible. That often got him yelled at for not hitting the right marks but he didn't care. He couldn't go near Logan. He would break if he did. Kendall and Logan's avoidance of each other didn't last long. During the middle of the song Carlos bumped into Logan and pushed him into Kendall making them both fall over. When they both opened their eyes they found that they were looking directly at each other. If Logan's eyes hadn't immediately clouded with tears he would have noticed the guilt, regret, concern, and love that flickered through Kendall's eyes. The sudden eye contact caused Kendall to drop his mask for a moment but Logan didn't notice. Logan shot up and ran out of the room. Carlos ran after him glaring at Kendall as he ran out. Kendall stayed on the floor and sighed. He looked up when he noticed James standing in front of him. Kendall furrowed his eyebrows when James offered him his hand. He stared at it for a moment then tentatively gripped James. James yanked him up then began to drag him out the door. They walked down the hall until James pulled open the door to Gustavo's office and threw Kendall in. Kendall stumbled then turned to James who was just finishing locking the door.

"I saw that." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows.

"What?"

"You're an open book Kendall. The minute you dropped your guard I saw everything. Guilt… anger… sadness… and most importantly love. You still love him. So start talking."

"There's nothing to talk about." James threw up his hands in frustration.

"Why do you keep saying that? There is plenty to talk about! Watching Logan is eating you up inside and I know it! You still love him but for some reason you don't want to admit it! Why are you doing this Kendall?"

"I'm not doing anything! Just get off my back!" Kendall tried to shove past James but he pushed him back.

"No! Not until you tell me what's going on!" Kendall tried to move past James again.

"I don't have to tell you anything!" James grabbed Kendall by his wrists.

"TELL ME WHAT"S GOING ON!"

"NO!"

"WHY WON'T YOU JUST TELL ME?"

"BECAUSE I CAN'T!" James released his hold on Kendall making him fall back. Kendall stumbled and landed on his butt by Gustavo's desk. He turned around and leaned on the desk to get up but he ended up putting his head against it as he began to shake. James watched wide eyed as Kendall began to cry quietly. The only indication that he was crying at all was from the whimpers and the fact that his body shook with the force of his crying. James walked over to Kendall slowly and knelt beside him.

"Kendall… what's going on?" Kendall shook his head and shut his eyes tightly.

"I can't tell anyone. Please James… please… just let it go!" James was too shocked to stop Kendall as he got up quickly and ran from the room. All the anger he was feeling towards Kendall disappeared. Something was going on and it was enough to make Kendall do what he did. Kendall had allowed his mask to drop and James had seen the pain Kendall was going through. He was suffering just like Logan was. James knew now more than ever that he had to get to the bottom of this. He had to start from the beginning and move until this very moment. James leaned against the desk and thought for a moment.

"Ok, Kendall broke up with Logan yesterday afternoon… not far enough. He didn't spend the night at the Palm Woods he slept here because… he met with Gustavo!" James jumped up. What ever happened with Kendall happened the night before the break up. Maybe Gustavo would know what happened. James ran into the hallway and looked back and forth. He noticed Carlos pacing in the dance studio so he ran over there.

"Carlos! Where is everyone?" Carlos sighed.

"I don't know where Kendall is but Logan is in the other room taking a nap and Kelly and Gustavo are outside the recording booth." James grabbed Carlos' arm and dragged him over to Gustavo and Kelly. They both looked up at the boys expectantly.

"James, Carlos what is going on?" Kelly looked extremely concerned. She had seen the state Logan was in when Carlos brought him back inside.

"Long story short Kendall broke up with Logan and is being an ass, but we can talk about that more later. Gustavo! Why did you need to see Kendall the other night?" Gustavo furrowed his eyebrows and looked at Kelly who also seemed confused.

"What are you dogs talking about?" Now it was James and Carlos' turn to be confused.

"Two days ago Kendall got a message saying that you needed to talk to him. And then he told Logan that he rerecorded some stuff for you then spent the night here." Kelly held her hand up stopping James from talking anymore.

"No one was here two nights ago. Gustavo and I were in Nevada. And the doors were locked, there's no way Kendall spent the night here." James and Carlos looked at each other wide eyed.

"WHAT!"

**A/N: DONE! It looks like James and Carlos may figure out what's going on soon. I wonder what they'll do with the new piece of information they just learned…. I wouldn't know because I haven't figured that out yet. Lol**

**There is more to come.**


	7. don't slip up again

Logan ran until he got outside. He sat against a wall and buried his face in his knees crying softly. Carlos came outside a few seconds later looking around franticly. He would have missed Logan and kept running forward if Logan's sniffing hadn't alerted him. Carlos walked over to his friend and sat down in front of him. He reached out rubbed Logan's arm trying to comfort him. Logan sat back his breath hick upping a few times.

"I can't do it Carlos. I can't be around him. It hurts too much. I love him." Carlos sighed and moved over so he was sitting next to Logan. He draped his arm over Logan's shoulder and pulled him close.

"I know. You can get through this Logan. When we figure this out everything will be ok." Logan nodded and leaned into Carlos allowing his friend to comfort him.

"I wish I could figure out what's going on." Carlos looked to Logan who had stopped crying. He seemed to be thinking but confusion was still written all of his face. "I feel so confused and hurt I just can't think straight. I'm not used to not being able to think straight. It's so frustrating." Carlos remained quiet. He wanted to tell Logan that he understood or he knew what he meant but in all honesty he didn't. He wasn't stupid but he wasn't smart like Logan. He didn't know what it was like to be constantly analyzing things and coming to different conclusions. Logan's brain was foggy and Carlos didn't know what it felt like to just not get yourself to relax and think. Carlos helped Logan up and led him back inside.

"Maybe if you get some rest you'll be able to think more clearly." Logan nodded. He wasn't used to feeling this tired. His emotions were just draining all of his energy. If things didn't change for the better soon he would probably go insane. When they walked back into the dance studio Kelly walked over to them looking extremely concerned. Logan just looked so drain.

"Logan, are you feeling ok?" She put her hand to his forehead to check if he had a fever.

"He's not sick he's just really upset." Kelly nodded at Carlos and helped him lead Logan to another room. They laid him down on a couch and watched him for a minute as he drifted off to sleep. Carlos sighed heavily and walked back into the dance studio. This situation was getting him so stressed out. He wasn't sure what to do. Carlos started pacing back and forth trying to think of some solution. He was drawing a blank and was about to give up when he heard James calling his name.

* * *

Kendall didn't know where he was running but he kept going. He allowed himself to break in front of James and he almost told him everything. He couldn't do that, he couldn't allow himself to do that. If Kendall slipped up that would mean instant death for Logan and he wouldn't b able to live with himself if he let Logan die. Kendall kept running down the sidewalk almost bumping into a few people because he vision was blurred by his tears. Kendall spotted a small park across the street and sprinted across not caring that he was almost hit by a car. He ran into the park and plopped himself on the ground in a secluded area. Kendall was on his hands and knees with his head hung low as he let his tears fall freely. He covered his mouth trying to quiet his loud sobs so no one would think to disturb him. After a few minutes Kendall was able to get a grip on himself. He shifted until he was lying on his back staring straight up at the sky. He let out a sigh and wiped away the last of his tears. "I'm sorry Logan. I love you so much. If you knew what I was doing you would say I was being illogical and that there is another way but… I don't see another way. I hope one day… you'll be able to understand."

"I doubt it." Kendall tensed and shot up. Ryan was standing a few feet away from him smirking.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"Oh you know… just checking up. You've done well so far but you slipped up." Kendall stood up eyes wide.

"How…"

"How did I see you talking to James and almost spill on what was going on." Ryan shrugged. "I have my ways. But your friends are getting suspicious. I might have to punish you… for your slip up." Ryan smirked causing Kendall to growl at him.

"I didn't tell him anything! I'm doing just what you said! Stay away from Logan!" Ryan took a few steps forward so he was standing face to face with Kendall. Kendall tensed staring straight at Ryan with dark eyes.

"Fine, I won't go near him. But Kendall," Ryan took his gun out of his back pocket and smacked Kendall in the face with the handle. Kendall stumbled back and hissed in pain. He held his hand to his cheek already feeling blood under his fingers. Before Kendall could fully recover Ryan grabbed his shirt roughly and pulled him so they were nose to nose. "That's just a taste of what will happen to Logan if you slip up again." Ryan threw Kendall to the ground and walked away. Kendall cursed to himself and wiped the blood off of his face with the back of his hand. He got up and headed back towards Rocque records so he could clean himself up.

* * *

"WHAT!" Kelly and Gustavo nodded both beginning to grow more concerned.

"But if he wasn't here then were did he go?" James looked to Carlos, Kelly, and Gustavo expectantly but none of them could think of an answer.

"And why did he need to lie to Logan?" James and Carlos nodded at Kelly. That was the most important question. It didn't matter where he was. What mattered was what happened that was so serious he couldn't trust his friends with it. Everyone stayed silent for a moment each one of them thinking to themselves. "You said that Kendall got a note telling him to come here right?" James and Carlos nodded. "Well that means whatever happened he wasn't expecting it. She he probably… did still… come here." Kelly was talking slow trying to make sense of her own thoughts. Gustavo suddenly stood scaring everyone.

"If he was here maybe the cameras caught something." Everyone perked up having a new sense of hope. They followed Gustavo into the control room which had over a dozen TV's with different images of Rocque records on them. "We can rewind the tapes and try and see if anyone of the cameras caught anything." Carlos looked to each TV and let out a frustrated sigh.

"There are so many different Cameras. This will take forever!" James turned to Carlos with a smile.

"Not if we narrow it down. Ok, the doors were locked so Kendall couldn't have been inside. That narrows down all of the cameras only showing the inside of the building." Everyone nodded at James but that still left quite a few Cameras.

"Also, if we start with the Camera's at the main entrance we can see when Kendall first gets here and switch to different Cameras depending on where ever he goes!" Kelly, Gustavo, and James stared at Carlos surprised.

"Nice thinking Carlos." He smiled at James then turned to focus on the TV's. Gustavo picked up a remote and rewound it. They waited for a minute until the date was two days ago.

"Wait! There he is!" Gustavo played the video when Kendall popped into the screen. He was just walking up to the door mumbling something to himself. "Is there any way we can hear what he's saying?" Gustavo nodded his head at Carlos and rewound the tape again. He higher the volume of the TV and everyone leaned in trying to listen.

_"This better be important Gustavo."_

"Well he obviously still thinks it's me who left the note." They all nodded and looked at the tape only to become confused.

"Wait! Where did he go?" Carlos stood so he was right in front of the TV. They only had been looking at Gustavo for a second but it was enough time for Kendall to disappear. "Rewind the tape." Gustavo did so until Kendall was at the door again. This time they didn't take their eyes off of him.

_"This better be important Gustavo."_

They watched as Kendall reached for the door handle then looked to the side. He looked confused as he slowly walked out of frame. Gustavo was about to start looking at another Camera when Carlos took the remote from him. "What are you doing?" Carlos didn't answer James as he rewound the tape. It played again and Carlos turned to them.

"Did you hear that?" The all looked at Carlos with furrowed eyebrows. Carlos was still standing right in front of the TV so he obviously heard something they did not. He higher the volume again then let it play.

_"This better be important Gustavo."_

_"Kendall…"_

They each gasped and looked at each other. "Who was that?" Carlos turned away from James and held the remote up.

"Only one way to find out." He rewound another Camera that was positioned on Kendall's left side. They watched the scene over again then watched as Kendall walked towards the Camera then into an ally that was out of frame. Carlos sighed with frustration as Kendall walked into the ally. "Do any of the cameras show a view of the ally?" Gustavo and Kelly shook their heads.

"That's the recording studios blind spot. There aren't any entrances or windows over there so a camera wasn't installed." James and Carlos sighed heavily.

"Are you sure Kelly?" She nodded her head sadly.

"I'm sorry James." He sighed and turned to Carlos.

"Well, we know enough. We just have to confront Kendall and get some answers out of him." Carlos nodded but stopped James from leaving.

"But where is Kendall and what about Logan?"

"We are going to have to go looking for Kendall." Before James continued Kelly interrupted him.

"Don't worry about Logan. Let him sleep. I'll take him back to The Palm Woods when he wakes up." James and Carlos nodded and thanked Kelly before running out the door.

* * *

Kendall continued to walk down the street ignoring all the looks he got because of the dried blood on his face. He stopped across the street from the recording studio and let out a sigh. It probably wouldn't be smart to go back there now. He looked around and settled on going to a coffee shop across the street. As he was walking to the coffee shop he didn't notice Carlos and James running out of the recording studio looking around frantically. They spotted Kendall and started running towards him as he entered the coffee shop. Kendall walked straight into the bathroom ignoring the looks the employees gave him. Once he was inside he walked over to the sink to inspect his cut. It wasn't deep but it was long. And there was a nasty bruise forming around it. The bleeding had stopped but his cheek was starting to get swollen. Kendall wet a paper towel and dabbed his face. He hissed in pain as it touched his sensitive skin. When the dried blood was gone he wet another paper towel with cold water and held it to his face. It wasn't an ice pack but it was the least he could do before he got home.

Carlos and James ran into the coffee shop and looked around. They didn't see Kendall so they walked up to the counter. "Did you see a blonde kid walk in here?" The employee frowned and nodded at James. He pointed to the bathroom and James and Carlos walked over before he could say anything else. When they walked into the bathroom Kendall turned to them with wide eyes. He obviously didn't expect them to be looking for him. He still had the paper towel to his face, which James and Carlos were staring at with confusion. James sighed and locked the bathroom door and turned back to Kendall. "You're telling us what's going on and I'm not letting you run away this time.

**A/N: and there you go. This chapter is kind of short but I didn't want to put the confrontation between the three guys in here. I want to draw out the story a little bit. It's probably not going to be as long as the first story unless I think of something that will extend it. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**There is more to come.**


	8. I warned you

**A/N: OK! Here is chapter 8. But before we begin I just want to say I finally got a chance to read **_**On Call**_** by Irishnotes92 and I want to say it is good. If you haven't read it yet I recommend it. I also recommend **_**When we were young**_** and **_**the butterfly affect**_** by TheRescuer2, **_**Thunder and Lightning**_** by TealMoose, **_**Staking the Claim**_** by ColbynauRisan and ANYTHING written by Miss Fenway (especially **_**Little Hollow, Innocence Lost **_**and **_**Three**_**). If you're the type who is just looking for some sexy I would recommend **_**For the**__**Love of Kogan **_**by waterwicca or **_**A Jargon Story**_** by XxTacoxX. I thought it was about time I recommended some fanfics especially since some of these people have been very loyal reviewers (ColbynauRisan and waterwicca) =]**

Kendall took a few steps back away from James and Carlos. He kept his eyes to the ground and did everything in his power to avoid eye contact with them.

"Kendall, we want some answers now!" James took a step towards Kendall. "We know you lied about staying at Rocque records the other night! Gustavo was in Nevada! Who did you see?" Kendall tried to keep the surprise from his face. He racked his brain for some excuse but he came up empty. The best thing he could do is deny, deny, deny.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Carlos huffed and took a step forward.

"I think you know exactly what we are talking about. We talked to Gustavo, he never saw you the other night. Who did you see?" Kendall unconsciously lowered his hand letting the paper towel fall. He bald of his fists and glared at his friends.

"I didn't see anyone!" Kendall furrowed his eyebrows when he noticed James and Carlos' anger subsided for a moment to be replaced with confusion.

"Kendall… what happened to your face?" James went to touch Kendall but he stepped back and held his hand to his cheek.

"Nothing! I fell! James became angry again.

"God damit Kendall when are the lies going to stop!"

"I have nothing to tell you! Stay away from me!" Kendall went for the door but James grabbed him. Kendall fought to get out of James grip and punched him in the gut. James let out a puff of air and grabbed his stomach. Kendall was about to run but he was tackled to the ground by Carlos. "GET OFF ME CARLOS!"

"NO!" Kendall and Carlos rolled around trying to dominate the other. Carlos was soon able to straddle Kendall's waist and at the moment James came over and pinned Kendall's arms above his head. Kendall thrashed around wildly trying to get away from his two friends. The cut on his face had started bleeding again and Carlos had a split lip. After a few more minutes Kendall finally gave up on thrashing and glared at the ceiling. The three boys were breathing heavily because of the scrap.

"Now… tell us what's going on." James huffed when Kendall remained silent. "Kendall!" He glanced at James for a moment then looked back at the ceiling.

"I don't care about him. What about that don't you get?" Kendall's tone was cold and level. He sounded almost robotic. James tightened his hold on Kendall's wrists to get his attention.

"No I don't get it Kendall. I don't understand that because I know it isn't true! You love him why won't you admit it! Why are you letting yourself and Logan suffer like this! It doesn't make sense!"

"IT DOESN"T HAVE TO MAKE SENSE! JUST SHUT UP!" Kendall tried thrashing again but Carlos and James kept their holds on him.

"Kendall stop!" Carlos continued to try and get his attention but he refused to listen. "Alright, if you don't care then I guess it wouldn't bother you to learn that Logan tried to kill himself this morning!" Kendall immediately stopped moving and stared at Carlos wide eyed.

"W-what?" Carlos sat back a little and gave Kendall a glare.

"I thought you didn't care! Why do you look so concerned? Considering you look so curious let me tell you that Logan was smothering himself with his pillow when James and I woke up this morning. Do you see what you're doing to him Kendall? Just tell us what happened!" Kendall remained quiet once again glaring at the ceiling. James rolled his eyes and let out a breath.

"What did you cheat on him or something?" Kendall gasped and glared at James.

"NO!"

"Did a Hawk kidnap you and threatened you with a horde of rabid ninjas!" Kendall and James both gave Carlos a weird look.

"What…?" James rolled his eyes and Kendall resumed glaring.

"No Carlos."

"Did Griffin tell you to break up with him?"

"No."

"Did Mercedes dress up like a zombie and scar you into breaking up with Logan?" James and Kendall gave Carlos another weird look.

"No Carlos. Jeez, what is with you?"

"Did someone tell you the band would end if you didn't break up with Logan?" Kendall let out sigh.

"No."

"Did Ryan come back from the dead and threaten to kill Logan if you didn't break up with him and pretend you didn't care about him!" James rolled his eyes.

"Carlos don't be…" James glanced down at Kendall confused. He was looking up at Carlos wide eyed. "Kendall?" Kendall snapped out of it but the astonished look still didn't leave his face. He glanced between James and Carlos but what James couldn't believe was that he wasn't saying no. James and Carlos glanced at each other then looked back down at Kendall.

"Kendall is… no that's not possible he's dead. Kendall?" Kendall just couldn't find it in himself to lie anymore. He remained silent but James and Carlos could already see the truth. As farfetched as Carlos' assumption was, it was 100% true.

"He's alive." James and Carlos gasped looking at each other wide eyed. Kendall started breathing erratically as tears fell down his face. "He said that he would kill Logan if I didn't do what he said. I-I love him so much. I didn't see any other way." James released his hold on Kendall and Carlos climbed off of him. They pulled Kendall into a hug attempting to comfort him.

"We could have helped you? Why didn't you tell us?" James rubbed Kendall's back as his tears began to stop.

"He said if I told anyone…" Kendall gasped and stood up quickly. "We have to go!" James and Carlos looked at each other than to Kendall confused. "He said if I told anyone he would kill Logan and I just told you!" Carlos stood up and put his hand on Kendall's shoulder.

"Calm down how would he know?" Kendall shook Carlos' hand off of him and paced.

"He knew about me talking to James in Gustavo's office he has to know about this!" James stood up and stared at Kendall.

"But how…"

"IT DOESN'T MATER! WE HAVE TO GO!" The three boys ran out of the coffee shop and ran across the street to Rocque records. They ran in to find Gustavo and Kelly in the editing booth. They ran in making Gustavo and Kelly jump.

"Boys? What's going on?" They ignored Kelly's question and looked around.

"Where's Logan?" Kelly pointed to the other room still confused.

"He hasn't woken up yet. Kendall, what's going on?" Kendall ran over to the room with everyone behind him. He opened the door and gasped when no one was there. Kelly pushed in and looked around completely confused. "This doesn't make any sense. I checked on him less than 2 minutes ago!" Carlos and James ran in and looked into the other rooms but couldn't find Logan anywhere. As everyone began to panic Kendall slowly walked over to the couch and picked up a bright pink piece of paper that was wedged between the seat cushions. He unfolded it and swallowed hard. James, Carlos, Gustavo, and Kelly stopped what they were doing and looked at Kendall. His eyes were wide and he was shaking like a leaf. Tears were starting to fall down his cheeks as he continued to stare at the paper. James walked over and took the paper from Kendall and read it out loud.

_I warned you._

_-Ryan_

* * *

Logan faintly heard the sound of a door opening. He peeked his eyes opened and barely noticed Kelly walking in then quickly leaving. When the door closed again Logan sighed and turned onto his back. There was no light in the room so Logan had no idea what time it was. He didn't know how long he had been asleep but he felt like it wasn't long enough. His mind was still foggy and the pain continued to drag him down into nothingness. Logan closed his eyes and let out a stuttering breath as tears came to his eyes. He lifted his hand to his neck and pulled the chain out from under his shirt. He held the rings in his hand sobbing quietly. "I miss you Kendall." Logan opened his eyes again but was shocked to find someone standing over him. He went to scream but the figure covered his mouth. Logan started breathing erratically and reached up attempting to pry the hand off his face. He looked up as the figure began to laugh. They leaned forward so Logan could see their face more clearly. Logan immediately stopped thrashing and dropped his arms. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. It was impossible. Logan started shaking uncontrollable completely gripped by fear.

"Goodnight love." The next thing Logan knew there was a sharp pain in his arm and the world was turning black.

* * *

"Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god!" Kendall paced back and forth tears streaming down his face. James and Carlos tried to think of something that might help while Gustavo and Kelly quickly called the police. After finally growing tired of Kendall James stood up and grabbed both his arms shaking him.

"Kendall calm down."

"Calm down! You want me to calm down! I killed Logan! How am I supposed to calm down! I killed him! He's going to die and it's all my…" Before Kendall could continue anymore James smacked him across the face, hard. Kendall cupped his cheek and stared wide eyed at James. After blinking a few times he finally composed himself.

"OW!" James rolled his eyes and pulled Kendall towards Carlos.

"You can thank me later. Right now we need to figure out where Logan is." Kendall took a breath then nodded. "We'll have to lure Ryan out of hiding somehow so we can follow him. But how?" Kendall sighed and sat down in a chair. He had no idea where Ryan was. He didn't have one single clue that could lead them to Logan. Kendall sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. He stopped when his finger brushed against something hard. He grimaced thinking there was a bug in his hair and pulled it out to look at it. His eyebrows furrowed when he realized it wasn't a bug but something else. There was a red light on one side and a tiny microphone on the top. His eyes widened when he realized what it was. It was how Ryan was able to know everything Kendall had been doing. Every conversation he had was being listened to. Carlos was looking at the microphone over Kendall's shoulder and was about to say something when Kendall threw his hand over his mouth. Everyone was looking at Kendall weirdly and when he lowered his hand from Carlos' face he put his finger to his mouth giving the "sh" signal.

"I don't have any idea what we are going to do but maybe we should stay quiet for a while so we can think." James and Carlos looked confused as they watched Kendall fiddle with the object until the red light turned off. He sighed and turned to his friends. "This is how Ryan knew what I was doing. He could hear our conversation with this. I don't know how he got it on me but that doesn't matter." Kendall turned to Gustavo who was watching the boys silently. "Do you think we can figure out where the signal for this thing is being sent?" Gustavo nodded and took it from Kendall.

"We'll find him boys. I know it."

* * *

Logan's eyes fluttered open and he groaned. His head was pounding and the bright light above him wasn't making things any better. Logan went to hold his arm above his eyes but soon realized his arm wouldn't move. Logan looked up and gasped when he realized he was handcuffed to the head board of the bed. Wait… bed? Logan looked around trying to figure out where he was. He was in a dark, dank room with no windows and no light other than a light bulb hanging above him. The only thing in the room was the bed he was currently lying on. Logan looked himself over noticing nothing particularly different. His legs weren't restrained, which worried him. Logan turned to his left and noticed that there was something else in the room. He whimpered slightly and shook with fear when he noticed a large knife hanging on the wall. Logan began sobbing and rolled over to his side into a fetal position. He was shaking so much the metal handcuffs were rubbing against the bars of the metal headboard and making a clanking noise. Logan assumed he was in some basement somewhere and he knew that if he didn't get out of here he was going to die. Logan flinched and his breathing became more erratic when he heard a door slowly open. He heard footsteps coming down a wooden staircase and with every step closer the person made the more Logan shook and the harder he cried. By the time Ryan was standing in front of Logan and smirking down at him Logan was sobbing.

"No… leave me alone! Please!" Logan let out a loud sob and tried his best to scramble away as Ryan reached down to touch his face. Ryan stroked Logan's cheek loving the sobs and whimpers that came out of him. Ryan moved down Logan's face and rubbed his neck. Logan screamed when Ryan suddenly tightened his hand but then released. He was getting pleasure out of watching Logan squirm. Ryan kept moving down stopping at the collar of Logan's shirt and moving his fingers under it. Logan whimpered as Ryan touched his soft skin. Ryan removed his hand from Logan's collar and moved to the hem of his shirt. He stuck his hand under moving over Logan's stomach and chest. Logan squirmed and cried louder. Ryan sighed and took his hand out of Logan's shirt.

"I'm going to have you soon… but not yet." Ryan left and walked back up the stairs closing the door behind him. Logan stayed quiet for a moment but then began thrashing wildly. He screamed at the top of his lungs and tried to get loose from his restraints. He ignored the pain moving through his wrists as the handcuffs cut and ripped off his skin.

"LET ME OUT OF HERE!" Logan let out another scream but stopped when he found breathing harder to do. A strange feeling moved through his chest making him shiver and grow cold. His heart raced and his eyes darted around the room trying to get a grip on something. Logan shook uncontrollable. He felt like he was dying. He shut his eyes and took deep breaths. He was having a panic attack and he knew as soon as it was over he would be ok. After a few minutes of deep breathing Logan felt the panic attack subside. He closed his eyes suddenly tired and allowed himself to drift off to sleep.

**A/N: that is the end! I don't know if you have ever had a panic attack but that's how I felt when I had one… it sucked. I literally felt like I was going to die. The first one was the worst cause I didn't know what was going on making me panic more but now if I start getting that feeling I just take a breath and it goes away. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**There is more to come.**


	9. almost

Logan had been awake for what he believed was three full hours but he faked sleep in order to delay the inevitable. It seemed that Ryan wanted him to wake on his own. Ryan had checked on him once every hour and each time it took all Logan had to remain still and not show his fear. Logan flinched when he heard the door bang open. It must have been Ryan's attempt at scaring him awake if he wasn't awake yet. Logan kept his eyes shut trying to hide his trembling. He faintly detected Ryan standing by him and heard him sigh with frustration. "Logan… I know… YOU'RE AWAKE!" Ryan grabbed Logan's face making him scream. Everything he had been hiding was showing again. "I'm not stupid Logan! Don't play games with me. I humored you for long enough." Ryan released Logan's face and gently moved his fingers through Logan's hair.

"Please… leave me alone…" Logan started breathing erratically when Ryan crawled onto the bed kneeling over him. He cupped Logan's face and rubbed his skin.

"You know Logan. You are beautiful when you're experiencing pleasure. I enjoyed watching you… that night you were with Kendall." Logan looked at Ryan wide eyed.

"W-what?"

"It was a few days ago. Your two friends seemed too swept up in their girlfriends to realize they left the door unlocked. I watched from your closet. When you two came home… when you two fucked. It was quite a show. I couldn't help but want some of that." Ryan pried Logan's legs apart and settled between them. Logan tried pushing Ryan off of him but his thrashing unfortunately had an unwanted affect. Ryan moaned as Logan bucked his hips into his erection.

"No… please…" Ryan mouthed at Logan's jaw ignoring his pleas.

"Kendall fucked you so hard. I couldn't help but get turned on as you begged for more. You're so captivating. It's probably why Kendall was able to give you up so easily." Logan stared at Ryan for a long time.

"What are you talking about?" Ryan smirked and rested on his elbows.

"Well I might as well tell you. The night before Kendall ended it with you I had a little meeting with him. I told him to break it off with you… or I would kill you." Logan gasped and he was suddenly angry.

"You son of a bitch, you made me think he didn't love me." Ryan chuckled.

"Don't blame me. You were the one who believed him so easily. It was so fun watching you two being torn apart. But of course Kendall broke the rules… so you can thank him for you being here." Logan was confused again.

"What?"

"Kendall told your two friends James and Carlos about our little agreement. I told Kendall if he told anyone you would die. So that's what's going to happen… after we have some fun first." Ryan crashed his lips into Logan's making him whine and thrash trying desperately to get away. Ryan moved his tongue against Logan's bottom lip but Logan refused to grant him access. Ryan punched Logan in the side making him cry out and open his mouth. He moved his tongue throughout Logan's mouth making Logan want to vomit. Logan tried pulling away from the kiss but Ryan held his face in place. He was starting to grow light headed from the lack of oxygen so in a desperate attempt to get away he bit down on Ryan's tongue. Ryan screamed in pain and sat up. He held his fingers to his tongue and looked at the blood. He glared down at Logan and spit out more blood. "You're going to fucking pay for that!" Ryan moved down again and bit Logan's neck. Logan screamed as his skin was pierced. Ryan threw his head back and moaned as he began thrusting his hips into Logan creating friction. Ryan panted into Logan's neck as he continued to ground his hips into him. Logan clenched his teeth and sobbed as Ryan continued to move against him. Logan hated this. He hated that this was happening again, he hated that someone other than Kendall was touching him, and most of all he hated his bodies reaction. Logan was disgusted to find himself getting hard. The unwanted movement was creating friction that normally he would be enjoying but in this case he absolutely refused.

"Stop…" Logan let out another sob as Ryan bit down on his neck again. He continued to moan, pant and thrust into Logan making him feel disgusting and sick. Ryan stopped his movements and sat up. He began to undo Logan's pants making Logan thrash. Logan closed his legs attempting to keep his pants on but Ryan punched him in the gut making him scream in pain. Ryan ripped off Logan's pants and boxers and undid his own pants. He released his erection not bothering to pull his pants down all the way. Logan once again tried to keep his legs closed but Ryan pried them open. Logan began to scream and cry as Ryan lined himself up with his entrance. Ryan looked up at Logan's face once more and smiled sadistically.

"Your mine." Ryan grabbed onto Logan's hips and was poking at Logan's entrance. Logan let out a sob not wanting this to happen again.

"NO PLEASE! KENDALL!" Before Logan knew what was happening Ryan was gone. Logan heard a loud thud and his eyes snapped open. He looked around then his eyes landed on to bodies on the floor. One of them seemed to be out cold and the other stood up slowly. Logan let out a sob as tears streamed down his face. "Kendall… thank god…"

* * *

Kendall, James, Carlos, and Gustavo were in his office working on trying to find Logan. Kelly was outside dealing with the police, who unsurprisingly were little help. They said they had to wait 48 hours before they could start looking for Logan. By that time it would be too late. They sent Kelly to deal with them and not tell them about the microphone. If they took their only way of finding Logan they would never find him. Gustavo had called Griffin who sent over some fancy tracking computer. Kendall had thought he was kidding when he talked about hunting humans but apparently he wasn't. They all stared anxiously at the computer as it analyzed the data from the microphone and tried to pin point a location. If Logan was here he would have loved this. But then again, if he was with them they wouldn't be doing this. The machine started beeping a map popped up on the screen. It zoomed in until it circled a location then a box with an address popped up on the screen. "It looks like it's coming from an abandoned house." Gustavo stated as he read the map. Gustavo turned around in his chair and looked at the boys. "And it's not too far from here."

"Where!"

"Two blocks in the direction of the Palm woods. Down King Street, house 234." Kendall bolted out the door with James and Carlos right behind him. Gustavo called out to them but they ignored him. When they began to run past Kelly and the police officers they tried to stop them.

"Boys where are you going?" The officers were blocking the entrance of the recording studio. Kendall glared at the two officers and clenched his jaw.

"We have to go! MOVE!" The officers looked at each other then shook their heads.

"You boys have to stay here. We can't let you go and do something stupid." Kendall was about to blow a gasket but then Carlos suddenly tackled one of the police officers. Kendall and James watched wide eyed as the other officer went to remove Carlos from his partner. Kendall snapped out of it quickly and ran out the door. James went to follow him but he was quickly grabbed by the officer.

"RUN KENDALL! FIND LOGAN!" Kendall glanced back for a moment then turned his attention to running forward. He sprinted down the street remaining completely tunnel vision. He ignored everything else and just focused on getting to Logan as quickly as he could. When he saw King Street he picked up his pace and made a quick turn. The first house was 198. Kendall huffed but continued. Kendall was getting tired but when he realized he was at 230 he sped up. When he got to 234 he sped up the drive way and stopped when he got to the front of the house. He listened for a moment but didn't hear anything. The lights were off and the windows were boarded up. The house looked like no one had lived in it in years. Kendall moved to the front door finding that there wasn't a doorknob on it. He pushed the door open and crept inside trying to keep as quiet as possible. He was starting to lose hope but then he spotted Ryan's gun on the coffee table. Kendall quickly grabbed it and ran back outside quickly hiding it in a bush. He could take Ryan if it was an even fist fight. It would be smarter for him to hide the gun then to try and use it.

"You're going to fucking pay for that!" Kendall started slowly walking in the direction of Ryan's voice. He ended up at the top of a staircase leading into a basement. Kendall tried to look down to see what was going on trying to get a handle on what he was walking into. When he heard Logan's voice begging for Ryan to stop. he immediately threw caution out the window. Kendall ran down the stairs and gasped when he saw what was happening. Ryan was over Logan, holding his legs open about to rape him again. Logan was screaming and crying both of them oblivious to Kendall's entrance. Logan called out Kendall's name making him speed up and launched himself at Ryan. They ended up on the opposite side of the bed. Ryan hit his head hard on the floor while Kendall landed on Ryan. He took a minute to collect himself then stood up. He turned around to see Logan staring at him wide eyed then bursting into tears.

"Kendall…" Kendall moved over to Logan and examined him for a moment. He put his pants back on him then focused on getting him out of there. Kendall cursed when he realized he was handcuffed. He went back over to Ryan's unconscious form and looked through his pockets. He sighed in relief when he found a key. He moved back over to Logan and undid the handcuffs. He was about to help Logan up when his eyes widened. "LOOK OUT!" Kendall pushed Logan off the opposite side of the bed and moved in enough time to avoid being stabbed. The large knife that had been hanging on the wall pierced the mattress making Logan swallow hard. That could have been him if Kendall hadn't thought to push him. Kendall kicked Ryan in the gut making him release the knife. Logan immediately scrambled over to it and grabbed it. He crawled back and held it in his hands as he watched Kendall and Ryan go at it. Ryan tackled Kendall and they began rolling around on the floor. They punched and kicked each other, ripping clothes and bruising skin. Ryan was able to get the upper hand and straddled Kendall holding his hands to his neck. Kendall thrashed as precious air was stopped from entering his longs. Ryan smirked and was about to tighten his grip but he fell to the ground with a thud after Logan wacked him in the back of the head with the handle of the knife. Logan fell to his knees and stared at the blood on the knife and his hand. He dropped it and crawled over to Kendall who was starting to catch his breath again.

"Are you ok?" Logan nodded and hugged Kendall for a moment before Kendall stood up to get them both out of there. He helped Logan up and quickly moved with him back outside. He pulled out his cell phone and called the police telling them everything. Ryan was knocked out cold. He would be out long enough for them to get him. Kendall held onto Logan tightly and continued to run with him. He didn't want to stop running until they were back at Rocque records. Logan tried to ignore the pain but he found he was barely keeping up with Kendall. When they made it back he sighed with relief. James and Carlos ran over to him and pulled him into a tight hug.

"Oh god Logan. Thank god you're ok!" Tears were streaming down Carlos' face. He was so happy to see his friend alive. James hugged Logan next squeezing him tightly as tears also came to his eyes. When James pulled away he held Logan by his shoulders.

"Are you ok?"

"I'll be fine." James sighed sadly but released Logan. He turned to Kendall who was standing off to the side watching. Logan stepped closer to him watching him silently. "Ryan told me everything." Kendall nodded in understanding still remaining silent. He didn't know what Logan would do with that information. Would he take him back? Or hate him forever. What Kendall didn't expect was to be thrown to the floor after being punched in the face. James and Carlos gasped and watched wide eyed. Kendall sat up and held a hand to his bleeding nose. Logan was still holding his fist out having not moved an inch since he hit Kendall. He slowly dropped his hand as tears came to his eyes. He dropped to his knees and buried his face in Kendall shirt. Kendall watched Logan wide eyed as he fisted the front of his shirt and began sobbing.

"Logan…"

"How could you do that to me? I don't care what your reasons were! You made me t-think you hated me! I would rather be dead then thing that everything that we've been through together meant nothing to you!" Kendall lifted Logan's chin with his free hand so they were looking at each other. Logan was still sobbing and fisting Kendall's shirt.

"Don't say that Logan. I never even want to imagine you never being around anymore. It may have hurt to watch you every day without being able to be with you but at least you were here. You have so much to live for. I didn't want your life to be taken away." Logan wrapped his arms around Kendall's torso and buried his face in Kendall's chest.

"I-I love you Kendall. I love you so much. Don't ever leave me like that again." Kendall squeezed Logan tightly not wanting to ever let him go. After spending a long time embracing each other Kendall finally pulled away when he found breathing out of his nose was impossible.

"I better go clean myself up." Everyone nodded and decided to go wait for Kendall outside. Logan however, clung to Kendall almost like the minute he let go Kendall would slip through his fingers. When they made it to the bathroom Kendall removed his hand from his nose and grimaced at all the dried blood. Some of it was from the fight with Ryan but most of the blood was from his bloody nose he got thanks to Logan. Kendall took a wet paper towel and cleaned off his face. He cleaned his nose of dried blood tearing up as his nose hairs were pulled out. He took a look inside his nose to make sure everything was clean then turned to Logan who was still clinging to him and looking down. Kendall turned to Logan and wrapped his arms around him. "Logan, are you ok?" Tears sprang up in his eyes and he buried his face in Kendall's shirt again. He shook his head as small sobs came out.

"H-he almost... He didn't but… it was so horrible. I feel so disgusting." Kendall wrapped his arms around tightly trying to reassure Logan that he was there for him.

"I'm so sorry Logan. I wish I had gotten there sooner. This is all my fault." Logan shook his head widely but didn't look up at Kendall.

"No, don't blame yourself. Just be here… don't leave."

"Ok." Kendall kissed the top of Logan's head and rocked on his feet a little.

_When I see your face  
There's not a thing that I would change  
Cause you're amazing  
Just the way you are  
And when you smile,_

Logan smiled against Kendall's chest and turned his head so he could look up at him. Kendall smiled at Logan and kissed his nose before continuing.

_The whole world stops and stares for awhile  
Cause __**boy**__ you're amazing  
Just the way you are_

Logan pulled away from Kendall and stepped back a few feet. He reached behind his neck and fiddled with the chain as Kendall watched him confused. When he finally got it off he slipped the two rings off and hesitantly stepped into Kendall's arms again. He held up his hand so Kendall could see the two rings sitting on his palm. Logan watched Kendall with apprehension remembering the last time he tried to give Kendall the ring. Kendall smiled and took both rings. He slipped Logan's on his finger and then held his up to take a look at it. He smiled as it flickered in the light. Kendall turned to Logan who was still looking nervous. He put the ring in Logan's hand and guided it onto his own finger. Logan smiled and laced his hand with Kendall's allowing the rings to touch.

"I love you." Logan smiled at Kendall but then replaced his smile with a pout.

"Get used to saying that every minute of every day because you have a lot of catching up to do." Kendall smiled and kissed Logan's lips softly.

"How long has it been?"

"15 seconds."

"Is it too early to say I love you?"

"No." Kendall smiled and kissed him again.

"I love you." Logan smiled and laid his head against Kendall's chest.

"I love you too."

**A/N: DONE! yey! Everyone's happy again… for now MUWHAHAHA! Lol **


	10. cuddle

**A/N: booo! Filler I-I mean yey! Filler!**

The fog began to fade allowing his surroundings to become clear. He stood on wobbly legs and stumbled over to the bed. Ryan shut his eyes tightly trying to think past the pounding in his head. He blinked his eyes as the pounding dulled and his vision focused. He didn't know how long he had been out but it was obviously long enough for Kendall and Logan to get away. Ryan clenched his fists and let out a scream of anger. He was breathing erratically as he walked over to the knife and picked it up. He ran upstairs and grabbed a bag sticking the knife in it. Ryan reached for where he placed his gun but found that his fingers touched nothing but the old wooden table. His head shot up when he realized the gun was missing. Ryan clenched his teeth his face turning red from his rage. He put the bag on his back and walked out the door slamming it behind him. He walked down the street still breathing heavily. His fists were bald up and anyone who noticed him quickly moved as far as they could away from him. They watched him walk past thanking god they weren't the source of his rage.

"I'll kill them. I kill all of them." As Ryan disappeared around the corner a cop car pulled up to the old house.

* * *

Logan walked through the living room with Kendall right behind him. Logan had a smug look on his face. Kendall was following him around like a love sick puppy.

"I love you Logan." James and Carlos who were sitting in the kitchen both groaned. When Logan said Kendall had to say that every minute of every day he wasn't kidding. After the first week Logan had actually relented a little bit… Kendall had to say it every five minutes. James and Carlos were starting to get tired of it. It was kind of funny seeing Kendall so whipped but the constant "I love you's" were getting on everyone's nerves. They were surprised Gustavo hadn't killed Kendall yet. Considering he would stop singing every five minutes to mouth I love you to Logan. James and Carlos hated it but Logan loved it. Most people would think being followed around would be annoying but Logan loved how clingy Kendall was being. It showed that he had power over him after all. Logan walked into his and Kendall's room and grabbed his book off his nightstand. When he turned around Kendall was giving him puppy dog eyes. Logan smirked and walked right past Kendall. Since he had gotten home he hasn't allowed Kendall to touch him… at all. He considered it punishment for being so cruel to him. Logan had allowed his emotions to control him when he first found out the truth but once he collected himself he went into "you're in big trouble mister and you're in the dog house until further notice" mode. Logan walked into the living room and sat on the couch. When Kendall went to sit next to him he got up and moved to the end of the couch. Kendall pouted and whined but Logan ignored him.

"Your punishment isn't over yet." Kendall huffed and sat back. He continued to stare at Logan with a pout on his face but Logan just ignored him. Kendall was dying. He hadn't had any physical contact with Logan in days. He hadn't held his hand or even brushed against him. Kendall was aching to touch Logan's soft skin but Logan wouldn't let him. Kendall glanced at his watch.

"Looooggggiiieeee! I looovvveeee yooouuuu!" Kendall whined. Logan snorted laughing slightly. He put his book down smiling at Kendall.

"Ok now you're just being silly." Kendall didn't let his pout fall and he continued to let out obnoxious whines. He was trying not to laugh at himself as Logan tried not to laugh at him. Logan eventually got up and left the room. Kendall sighed and lay on the couch. He looked up at the ceiling retreating into his own thoughts.

"I miss you Logan." Kendall snapped out of it and furrowed his eyebrows when he heard the sound of feet moving quickly towards him. "What the…" He went to looking up but gasped and groaned when a sudden weight was on top of him. Kendall blinked a couple of times looking down at Logan who had randomly jumped on top of Kendall and was snuggling into him. Logan leaned his elbows on Kendall's chest and smiled down at him. He bent down and kissed his lips softly then pulled back to rub his nose against Kendall's.

"Ok, I think you've suffered enough." Kendall smiled brightly and wrapped his arms around Logan tightly. Kendall showered Logan's face with kisses making Logan giggle. "Kendall, stop." Kendall chuckled and kissed Logan on the cheek once more.

"So, what do you want to do today?" Logan smiled and rested his head on Kendall's chest.

"I don't know but I'm fine with this so far." Kendall smiled and grabbed the remote and turned the TV on. If Logan wanted to lie on the couch and cuddle all day Kendall was ok with that. He hadn't been able to cuddle with Logan in forever and he missed it. Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan's waist and moved his fingers up and down Logan's lower back. He smiled when Logan relaxed more and sighed contently. Kendall lifted Logan's shirt and started kneading his lower back. Logan closed his eyes moaning happily at the soft contact. "That feels good." Kendall kissed the top of Logan's head and continued to massage his back. Kendall kept moving higher up Logan's back until his shirt wouldn't lift anymore. He massaged the areas he could reach and after a while it seemed like Logan was falling asleep. Kendall smirked and moved his fingers towards Logan's sides. He hovered over Logan's skin there for a moment then started furiously tickling him. Logan squealed and fell off Kendall landed on the floor. Logan groaned and glared up at Kendall who was trying to stifle his laughter. When Logan stood up he glared at James and Carlos who were laughing hysterically. They hadn't been paying much attention to Kendall and Logan but they didn't miss that. Logan turned to Kendall and pouted at him. "Jerk."

"Aw I'm sorry Logie. You're so cute when you're being tickled, I couldn't help myself." Logan didn't drop his pout as he plopped down next to Kendall and resumed cuddling with him. After a few minutes the phone rang. Carlos was the closest so he reached over and picked it up. Logan turned in Carlos' direction suddenly curious to who he was talking to. His face looked serious almost scared and Logan couldn't help but feel a little fear as well. Logan shifted slightly cramming himself between Kendall and the couch. Logan laid his head on Kendall's shoulder and fisted his shirt. Kendall looked at Logan concerned. His eyes were fixed on Carlos with a worried expression on his face. Kendall turned to look at Carlos who had just hung up the phone. He looked worried as his whispered to James who also looked nervous. Kendall tightened his hold on Logan feeling his own sense of worry. Carlos and James walked over to Kendall and Logan slowly and silently stood in front of them. "Guys, what's going on?" James and Carlos looked at each other before James spoke.

"That was the police on the phone. When they got to the abandoned house Ryan was gone. He got away." Kendall pulled Logan closer to him when he heard him let out a quiet whimper and start shaking slightly.

"Why did they wait so long to tell us that?" Everyone remained silently not really sure what they could say.

"Kendall… what are we going to do?" Kendall sighed. Carlos was looking at Kendall expectantly just like James and Logan were. They were looking to him for guidance because he always had all the answers.

"I really don't know."

**A/N: sorry for this crappy short chapter. I don't really know where I was going with this. This is really just filler until I can think of more stuff that can happen. Anyway, I hope you still enjoyed this chapter a little now I'm going to go and wait patiently for my BTR cd to arrive! =]**

**There is more to come.**


	11. take a cold shower

Logan had been lying in bed since 11 trying to fall asleep but no matter what he did he couldn't fall asleep. It was now 2 in the morning and Logan was still awake. Every time Logan tried to shut his eyes he kept getting the feeling someone was standing over him. His eyes would shoot open and no one would be there. Where is Ryan right now? What if he's in the apartment? What if he's watching me? Logan looked towards Kendall's bed. He was fast asleep making Logan jealous. He could fall asleep so easily. Logan let out a sigh and shut his eyes. He was being paranoid. He checked the apartment before he went to sleep and everything is locked up tight. After a few minutes Logan was about to be gripped by sleep until he heard a noise. Logan's eyes shot open and he looked around nervously. It was quiet but then Logan thought he heard the sound of footsteps. Logan sat up and held his breath as they got closer and closer to his room. The door was slightly open and to Logan's horror it started to creak open more. Logan screamed and jumped out of bed. He ran to Kendall's side of the room and jumped onto Kendall's bed.

"KENDALL!" Kendall woke with a start when Logan jumped on top of him.

"W-what the…" Kendall reached over and turned on his desk lamp. It illuminated the room and allowed Kendall to see Logan clinging to him and sobbing. Kendall looked up at also noticed a very confused Carlos was standing at the door. "Carlos?"

"Sorry I thought I left my iPod in here. I didn't mean to scare him." Kendall sighed and gave Carlos an annoyed look. He knew Carlos didn't mean any harm so he couldn't get mad at him. Kendall reached to his nightstand and picked up Carlos' iPod. He threw it to Carlos and said goodnight. Carlos apologized once more before leaving. Kendall turned his attention to Logan who was trying to hide himself. When Kendall sat up Logan crawled behind him and wrapped his arms around Kendall. He was sobbing and shaking as he glanced at the door just waiting for someone else to walk into the room. Kendall took Logan's arm and maneuvered him so they were both lying on the bed facing each other. Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan tightly and rubbed circles in his back trying to comfort him.

"It's ok Logan it was only Carlos." Logan nodded and took in a breath. He stopped sobbing but he was still shaking slightly. He glanced past Kendall everyone once in a while to make sure no one was there. Logan cuddled closer to Kendall and buried his face in Kendall's shirt.

"I-I sorry. I was just so afraid I would wake up and he would be in here and when I heard someone coming into the room…" Logan tried getting even closer to Kendall finding the warm of his body comforting. "I'm so scared." Kendall tightened his arms around Logan and kissed the top of his head.

"I know, but I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Try and get some sleep. Ok Logie." Logan nodded and closed his eyes. It took about an hour of Kendall rubbing his back comfortingly, kissing him sweetly, and whispering sweet nothings to him in order to get Logan to fall asleep. Kendall sighed and closed his eyes. The sound of Logan's soft snoring lulled him to sleep.

* * *

_Logan awoke and smiled when he realized he was still in Kendall's arms. He snuggled closer to him and patted his chest. "Kendall, wake up." Kendall didn't move so Logan shook him. "Kendall, come on wake up." Kendall still didn't move making Logan worry. "Kendall?" Logan sat up and turned Kendall's head toward him. He gasped when he noticed Kendall's eyes were open wide and staring into nothingness. A line of blood was coming from Kendall's mouth and his skin was sickly pale. Logan screamed when he finally noticed the large knife in Kendall's gut. Logan shook Kendall's shoulders as tears streamed down his face. "KENDALL PLEASE! DON'T LEAVE ME!" Logan went to shake Kendall more but suddenly someone had hold of his ankle and was pulling him out of Kendall's bed. Logan looked up and let out a scream when he realized it was Ryan. _

"_Don't bother screaming Logan. No one can save you now." Ryan grabbed hold of Logan's ankle and started pulling him out of the room. Logan clawed at the floor as he was dragged backwards. The only thing he was staring at was Kendall's life less form._

"KENDALL!" Logan shot up and looked around wildly. He was panting and shaking as tears streamed down his face. Kendall came running into the room looking extremely worried.

"Logan, what's wrong. Why did you call me?" Logan didn't answer and wrapped his arms around Kendall's neck. He buried his face in Kendall's shoulder and sobbed loudly. Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan and squeezed him reassuringly. "It's ok Logan, I'm here. Did you have a nightmare?" Logan nodded his head and pulled himself closer to Kendall.

"I-I woke up and I was t-try to wake you up but you wouldn't so I turned your head to look at you and you… you were dead! You h-had a knife in you and then Ryan was here and he was dragging me away!" Kendall kept Logan close to him but pulled his head back so he could look at Logan.

"It was just a dream. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere." Kendall showered Logan with kisses and whispered soothing words in his ear. When Logan was calmed down they both got up and headed for the kitchen. James and Carlos were already awake and they gave Logan concerned looks when he walked in. Carlos stood up and gave Logan a tight bear hug. When he pulled away he looked extremely guilty.

"I'm really sorry I scared you last night Logan." Logan patted Carlos' shoulder and gave him a small smile.

"It's ok. I know you didn't mean it." Carlos relaxed a little and smiled at Logan. He went back to his previous spot at the table and began talking to James and Kendall. Logan walked over to the frig and looked inside. He wasn't in the mood to really cook. He spotted a huge stack of pancakes with a note from Mrs. Knight.

_Logan,_

_I know you're having a tough time so I already made breakfast for you and the boys. Enjoy the pancakes and try to relax. We're all here for you sweet heart. _

_3 Mama Knight_

Logan smiled. Mrs. Knight was such a sweet person. She always treated Logan like one of her own children and it always helped the pain of being an orphan hurt less. Logan took out the pancakes and heated them up. He poured everyone a glass of orange juice and brought the food to the table. He sat between Carlos and Kendall feeling much better with all his friends around.

"Hey Carlos, did you ever talk to Stephanie? James and Logan looked at Kendall with furrowed eyebrows. What was going on with Carlos and Stephanie? Carlos sighed and shook his head.

"With everything that went on I never did get a chance to talk to her." Kendall nodded in understanding. James and Logan looked at each other feeling completely lost.

"What happened with Stephanie?" James asked. Carlos sighed.

"I'm going to break up with her. She doesn't like me like I like her. And now that I think about it, she hasn't tried to call me at all and it's been like 2 weeks since a last saw her. You would think she would be wondering what was going on." Logan and James patted Carlos on the back and gave him a sad smile.

"Don't worry dude. You'll find someone better." Carlos sighed and nodded at Logan. They finished up their breakfast talking about random things and trying to stay away from anything serious as long as possible. When they were done Kendall helped Logan clean the dishes while James and Carlos went to their room to get ready to go to the pool. When Kendall and Logan put all the dishes in the sink Logan started washing them. Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan's waist and started kissing his neck. Logan smiled and took one of Kendall's hands putting a plate in it.

"Please stop molesting my neck and put the dishes away." Kendall chuckled and licked a line from Logan's neck to his ear making him shutter. Kendall pulled away smiling and put all the dishes away. When they were done he turned Logan around and leaned against him. Kendall pulled Logan into a passionate kiss. He moved his tongue throughout Logan's mouth. Logan moaned into the kiss and wrapped his arms around Kendall's neck. Logan continued to moan into the kiss turning on Kendall even more. Soon they were vigorously moving their lips against each other in a deep teeth clashing kiss. When the need for air became too great they pulled apart panting heavily. Kendall leaned his forehead against Logan's and kissed his lips again, pulling on Logan's bottom lip.

"I want you Logie." Kendall suddenly found the absence of Logan's body heat. He blinked and looked at Logan with raised eyebrows. He had stepped away from Kendall.

"Did you really think you were completely off the hook?" Logan put most of his weight on his right leg and placed his hand on his hip in a very girl like manor. Kendall grinned sheepishly and laughed nervously.

"Uh… yes." Logan scoffed.

"Yea… no." You are allowed to kiss and cuddle with me now but we haven't gotten to that level of forgiveness yet." Kendall whined and pouted.

"But Logan… I want you so bad." Logan glanced down and noticed the bulge in Kendall's pants. He looked back up at Kendall's face and smirked.

"Well I guess you'll be stuck with your hand and dirty fantasies for a while." Logan turned and walked back towards his and Kendall's room. "I'm going to take a shower. I suggest you take one too!" Kendall huffed and shuffled into the kitchen bathroom grumbling to himself. When he stepped into the bathroom Kendall closed the door behind him and stripped. He stepped into the shower and turned on the water to a nice, warm temperature. He sighed loving how the water felt against his skin. He sighed and glanced down. His problem still hadn't gone away yet. Kendall reached down and hissed as he took hold of his erection. Logan was kidding but Kendall did exactly what he said. He furiously jacked himself off as he imagined Logan in the shower with him. He thought about pushing Logan into the tilled wall and holding him up as he fucked him senselessly. Logan would have his arms wrapped around Kendall's neck tightly and his face buried in his shoulder. He would be moaning and whining with ever deep thrust Kendall gave him. Kendall moaned and sped up his hand. His hips thrust forward as he thought about Logan moaning for more. Kendall let out a low groan and came. His hips stuttered and he placed his hand on the wall in order to keep him up. Once he recovered he finished his shower and stepped out.

* * *

Logan walked into his and Kendall's bathroom and took of his clothes. Kendall hadn't been the only one turned on. He wanted Kendall but he couldn't allow himself, not yet. There was still a thought nagging Logan at the back of his mind that Kendall was just using him. And until Kendall proved that he loved Logan he wouldn't let Kendall have all of him. Granted, saving him and confessing his love for Logan over and over again had done a great deal in showing Kendall did actually love him but Logan needed a little more time. He stepped into the shower and sighed as the water washed away all the sweat and dirt covering his body. Logan bit his lip and reached down. He whined as he moved his hand up and down his erection. He sped up his hand as he thought about Kendall bending him over forcefully and fucking him into oblivion. Logan let out a moan but after a while he realized just his hand wasn't enough. He bit his lip and suddenly remembered something. Logan jumped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist. He peeked into the room and walked in quickly when he was sure Kendall wasn't there. He rummaged through Kendall's closet and pulled out a plastic package. Logan ran back into the bathroom and shut and locked the door. He took the scissors out and quickly opened it and hopped into the shower. It had been for a prank between himself, James, and Carlos (1). For Kendall's last birthday they had decided to give Kendall an assortment of different toys. They had watched Kendall trying to stifle their laughter as he pulled out each toy with a smile on his face. First a toy robot, then a yo-yo, then some race cars, and next a vibrator. The look on Kendall's face had been hilarious. As Logan turned on the toy he couldn't help but think it was funny that he was actually getting some use out of it. Logan eyed it for a moment and swallowed past the lump in his throat. It wasn't those small egg shaped once it was the long ones. James had gotten his cousin to buy it for them because they were to embarrassed to do it. Logan leaned his hand against the wall and spread his legs. He reached behind him and pressed it against his entrance. Logan's eyes rolled back and he moaned. Just a simple touch made his dick throb. He teased his entrance for a couple of minutes and then pushed it in. His hips stuttered as it moved around inside him. Logan found that it was nearly impossible to support his weight. He dropped down on his hands and knees and began moving the object in and out. He thrust his hips and moaned as he pushed it in and out of him.

"Oh god." Logan's mouth hung open and his eyes rolled back as he touched his prostate. The vibrations caused rapid stimulation which made Logan's head spin. He kept the vibrator pushed in and held it pressed against his prostate. His hips stuttered and he let out a moan as he came. Once he recovered he pulled out the vibrator and turned it off. Logan sighed and stood up. Once he was having sex with Kendall again he definitely thought it would be a good idea to use that. Logan finished showering and climbed out. When he was dried and dressed he hid the vibrator so no one would no he used it. Logan walked into the living to find Kendall, James, and Carlos waiting for him. As soon as he walked out they picked up their pool gear and headed out the door. Kendall wrapped his arm around Logan's waist and kissed the top of his head. Logan smiled and leaned against Kendall. When James and Carlos were far enough away Kendall leaned down to whisper in Logan's ear.

"It looks like I'm not the only one who took a cold shower. I think you miss getting fucked more then I miss fucking you." Logan hit Kendall's chest and blushed furiously.

"You're disgusting." Kendall laughed as they stepped into the elevator with their friends.

* * *

Ryan was in the attic of an abandoned house pacing the floor. He was biting his finger nails as he whispered and mumbled to himself.

"I'm going to get you Looogaaan. You'll be mine soon enough. Just you wait… just you wait.

**A/N: and there you have it. the end of another chapter. I hoped you enjoyed it.**

**There is more to come**

**(1): my friends did that to someone lol. I was at the party. Her face was hysterical. She is a complete prude.**

**YEY! I actually remembered to write what the (1) was =]**


	12. fun at the museum

Another week past and Logan was going insane. Why hadn't Ryan come after them yet? Did he give up? Was he just waiting for them to put their guard down? The suspense was killing Logan. He wanted to know if Ryan was going to come after them or not. He just wanted Ryan to be caught. Kendall could sense Logan's anxiety and he did everything he could to try and keep him calm. He never left Logan's side and he didn't have a problem with Logan sleeping in his bed. He would do anything to reassure Logan that he would keep him safe.

It was late at night and Logan and Kendall were about ready to go to bed. Logan crawled into Kendall's bed and plopped down next to him. He rested his head on Kendall's shoulder and let out a content sigh when Kendall started running his hand up and down his side. Kendall moved his hand in small circles then moved towards Logan's stomach.

"Don't even think about it." Kendall huffed and moved his hand back to Logan's side. Logan looked up at laughed at the pout of Kendall's face.

"We can't even have a little fun?" Logan closed his eyes and snuggled into Kendall more.

"Nope." Logan giggled when Kendall let out a whine. After a few minutes of silence they both drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Logan awoke the next morning to the sound of his vibrating cell phone. He looked around sleepily and finally spotted it on the night stand. Logan reached over Kendall affectively waking him up.

"Huh? Logie, what time is it?" Logan laughed at Kendall's half asleep state.

"I don't know." Logan frowned when he noticed the caller ID was an unknown number. He swallowed hard remembering the times that Ryan would call him. "Kendall?" Kendall looked up at Logan with worry. He sounded a little nervous. Logan showed Kendall the screen. "C-can you answer it?" Kendall sat up and nodded. He wrapped his arm around Logan and answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Kendall? It's Kelly, where's Logan?" Kendall let out a sigh of relief.

"Hey Kelly, Logan didn't want to answer cause it said unknown caller. What happened to your phone?" Kelly let out an annoyed sigh.

"Gustavo sat on it. Anyway, you boys don't have to come in today. So make sure you all get some rest." Kendall thanked Kelly for calling then hung up the phone. He turned to Logan and kissed him sweetly.

"Kelly says we don't have to come in today. So, "Kendall glanced at the clock then back to Logan, "Since it is 10 we should probably get up." Logan nodded and kissed Kendall's lips before crawling out of bed. Kendall licked his lips as he stared at Logan's ass while he climbed out of bed. Logan looked back at Kendall and blushed.

"Stop staring at my butt." Kendall chuckled and got up from the bed. He stood in front of Logan and reached around to grab his ass as he pulled him close.

"I can't help it." Logan let out a moan as Kendall teased his entrance through his thin pajamas. Logan smacked Kendall's chest and glared at him.

"No." Kendall pouted.

"You sound like your disciplining a dog." Logan smirked.

"Well… you are my bitch." Kendall's jaw dropped open as he watched Logan walk away from him. Logan looked back at Kendall and started laughing. He walked into the bathroom to get ready.

* * *

Logan walked into the living room to find Kendall watching TV. He looked around then plopped next to Kendall on the couch.

"Where is everyone?"

"Well, as soon as James and Carlos found out we had a day off they went straight to the pool. And my mom and Katie went to an audition." Kendall turned to Logan with a smirk on his face. "That means we have the apartment all to ourselves." Logan smirked and rubbed Kendall's chest.

"Really, well I guess we should **no**." Kendall huffed and turned back to the TV. "Why don't we go out today? A new museum opened up down the street from here!" Kendall chuckled at Logan. He loved how excited he could get about stuff like that. He nodded his head and Logan jumped up excitedly. They left the apartment deciding to walk because the museum was so close. When they got there Kendall couldn't believe how large it was. "You know a lot of people are saying that the only museum that rivals this one is the Metropolitan." Kendall stared at Logan for a moment. Logan let out a sigh. "The Metropolitan is in New York City. It has millions of different works in it. It's impossible to see everything in that museum in one day. Kendall made an "oh" face and nodded. They paid for a pass then walked into the museum. Kendall didn't really look at the sculptors like Logan did. He looked at it for a moment then spent the rest of his time watching Logan. Logan's expressions were adorable. He would cross his arms behind his back and tilt his head to the side. He would chew on his lower lip and furrow his eyebrows in thought. It seemed like he was trying to figure so many things at once. Why did they do this? What does it mean? After he would stare at a piece for a good five minutes he would move on to the next one. Kendall attempted to do what Logan was doing. He turned to the piece and stared at it. It took him a few seconds to realize he was looking at a naked woman being peed on. Kendall grimaced and moved on.

"There are some things that should not be considered art." Logan turned to look at Kendall.

"What do you mean?" Kendall pointed to the painting of the woman getting peed on.

"That's nasty… not art." Logan chuckled and pulled Kendall into the next room. They stood in front of a sculpture of a man and a woman having sex.

"What about this? Do you think this is art?" Kendall looked at the sculpture then smirked.

"Well of course, two bodies together moving as one. Completely absorbed in pleasure; moving rapidly in order to find that ultimate release." Kendall had moved his hand under the back of Logan shirt as he spoke. He whispered in his ear sensually as he caressed his skin. Logan bit his lip and shuttered. Logan closed his eyes and pressed himself into Kendall until he remembered where they were.

"Will you stop." Logan smacked Kendall's chest and looked around making sure no one was looking at them. "God, it hasn't been that long since we last did it calm down." Kendall chuckled and followed Logan into the next room. After a few hours they stopped by a small restaurant in the museum to get food. It was a little pricey but they didn't want to leave and go somewhere else. Once they were done eating they moved to the rest of the museum. The one exhibit Logan wanted to see the most was the Egyptian one. He found everything about Egypt fascinating so when they reached the entrance to find it closed he was disappointed. "What… why is it closed?" Logan sighed and turned to Kendall. "I guess we can't see it." Kendall frowned. He didn't want Logan to be disappointed. He looked around and spotted an entrance that wasn't blocked off. Kendall smirked and grabbed Logan pulling him through it.

"Come on lets go." Logan swallowed hard and looked around. He tried to get out of Kendall's grip but he had a really good hold on him.

"Kendall, we'll get in trouble." Kendall chuckled but kept going. They went through another door and found themselves in the Egyptian exhibit. Logan forgot about his anxieties and looked around amazed. "Amazing." Kendall smiled and wrapped his arm around Logan.

"Anything for you." Logan smiled up at Kendall then suddenly pulled him into a deep kiss. Kendall was surprised at first but eventually he smiled into the kiss. _"Success"_ was the only thing Kendall could think of as he backed Logan against one of the walls and ravished his mouth. So apparently Logan found Kendall breaking the rules for him a turn on… who knew? Logan moaned into the kiss and ran his hands over Kendall's chest. When Kendall broke the kiss to suck and bite Logan's neck he seemed to get some of his common sense back.

"W-we can't… not here…" Logan breathed out. Kendall ignored him and ground his crotch into Logan's making him moan. Logan threaded his fingers through Kendall's hair and met him one every thrust.

"I want you so bad." Kendall bit down on the point where Logan's shoulder and neck met. Logan gasped and thrust his hips into Kendall.

"Kendall…" Kendall chuckled as Logan whined and looked up at him.

"What?" Logan swallowed hard and looked around. He let out a sigh letting Kendall know he was giving in.

"Fine, I don't want to have to walk around here with a boner anyway but we have to be quick. Leave your clothes on." Kendall nodded and resumed sucking on Logan's neck. He undid his pants and pulled them down enough so he could release his throbbing member. Kendall reached down and undid Logan's pants then forcefully turned him around. Logan moaned and rocked his hips back making Kendall let out a growl. Kendall pulled down Logan's pants and put his fingers to Logan's mouth. He groaned and ground into Logan as he sucked on his fingers. Once his fingers were wet enough he moved to Logan's entrance and shoved them both in. They didn't have time to go slow. Logan yelped and bit his lip. Kendall moved his fingers in and out in a scissoring motion. He picked up his speed when Logan began to moan. Kendall added another finger and once Logan got used to it he removed his fingers. Kendall kissed the back of Logan's head and aligned himself. When he poked at Logan's entrance Logan let out a moan and moved his hips trying to coax Kendall into entering him.

"Don't scream to loud." Before Logan could reply Kendall thrust into him. Logan bit his lip in order to stop himself from crying out. Kendall stayed unmoving until Logan started to whimper and thrust backwards. Kendall pressed himself fully against Logan and began to furiously thrust into him. Logan laid his head against the wall and let out a long moan. He moved his hips back to meet Kendall's allowing his prostate to be hit on every thrust. Logan clawed at the wall as Kendall picked up his pace. The speed and force they were going at added with the thrill of the possibility of getting caught made this some of the best sex they ever had.

"Oh god." Logan could feel his climax approaching and by Kendall's grunts and panting he could tell that Kendall was close to. "I'm g-gunna come!" Kendall gave one more deep and powerful thrust making Logan cum moaning his name. Kendall thrust into Logan three more times before grunting and shooting his seed into Logan. They continued to move against each other until they were completely emptied. Kendall pulled out of Logan and turned him around so he could kiss him passionately.

"See, I knew you wanted it." Logan smacked Kendall's chest and kissed his cheek. They pulled their pants back up and were about to leave when they heard someone come into the room.

"Is anyone in here?"

"Shit we're dead!" Logan hissed out. He grabbed Kendall's hand and led him in the opposite direction of the voice. Kendall chuckled and followed Logan. When they were far enough away they stopped to take a breath. "That… was… close." Logan took in a deep breath to calm himself. He walked back over to Kendall and wrapped his arms around him. "You almost got us in a lot of trouble. Kendall scoffed and wrapped his arms around Logan's waist.

"Me! You weren't very opposed to the idea if I recall."

"If I recall I told you we couldn't but then you turned me on so bad that I couldn't help but let my hormones take over." Kendall chuckled and rolled his eyes. He wrapped his arm around Logan's waist ready to go but stopped in his tracks. Kendall's jaw clenched and he tightened his grip on Logan who was fisting his shirt and shaking.

"Hello boys."

**A/N: and that is the end! This chapter took a little while to get up… sorry bout that lol. I mean I was just so busy I … no I was just really lazy. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter**

**There is more to come. **


	13. I can't lose him

Kendall quickly placed Logan behind him and planted his feet firmly in the ground. His whole body went tense as he glared and growled at the person standing in front of him. Logan peered past Kendall while fisting the back of his shirt. Logan swallowed hard and tried to remain calm. It was only a matter of time before Ryan would come after them and apparently this was it.

"I would have thought that you would have gotten the message by now. Stay away from us!" Kendall hissed out. Ryan only smirked and took a step forward causing Kendall to growl at him again. Logan hid himself more behind Kendall allowing Ryan's view of him to be blocked. He wasn't doing this from fear but so Ryan wouldn't see him pull out his phone. Logan quickly dialed 911 and listened carefully he heard the dispatcher answer but he knew he couldn't say anything. Logan pressed the 2 and then 3 then 2 buttons again on his phone. He was attempting to send the dispatcher S.O.S. in Morse code. He could only pray that she would understand.

"I'm so glad I was able to find you to here." Ryan pulled out his gun and pointed it at Kendall. He cocked it so Logan could here. "Put the phone away Logan." Logan closed his phone and put it back in his pocket. He didn't know if anyone would come but there was nothing he could do now. Ryan walked over to them making them tense even more. Logan gasped and grabbed Kendall's arm tightly when Ryan pointed the gun right at Kendall. Kendall tried to keep calm for Logan's sake but that was pretty hard to do with a gun pointed in your face. He had to get Logan out of here. He didn't know how or if he would even be able to do it but he had to try.

"Why do you keep attacking us? What are you getting out of this?" Ryan glanced over Kendall's shoulder at Logan. Logan shook under Ryan's intense gaze making Ryan smirk.

"No one gets away from me. Absolutely nobody and if I have to kill to make sure of that then so be it!"

"You're insane!" Ryan laughed sadistically and pointed the gun at Logan. Kendall stepped in front of Logan again making Ryan frown. Ryan started to breath heavy and slowly pointed the gun at Kendall again.

"You… you are ALWAYS getting in the way. Not this time… this time you die… first." Ryan hit Kendall with the gun making him fall on the ground. He went to point the gun at him but Kendall swiftly tripped him. The gun flew out of Ryan's hand and the three boys looked at each other before scrambling for it. Kendall punched Ryan in the gut and went for the gun. Before he could grab it Ryan grabbed his ankle and pulled him back. Logan then ran for the gun but Ryan swiftly grabbed the back of his shirt and pulled him to the ground hard. Logan hit his head on the floor making his vision go blurry. Kendall clenched is jaw and punched Ryan again. They scuffled on the floor each one of them trying to get to the gun. While this was going on Logan sat up and put his hand to his head. He groaned in pain and felt the back of his head. When he pulled his hand back his fingers were covered in blood. Logan blinked until his vision went back to normal. By the time he regained his composure Kendall and Ryan had reached the gun and they were wrestling for it. Logan stood up quickly but there wasn't much he could do. If he tried to get the gun he could run the risk of helping Ryan rather than Kendall. Logan looked around and hoped he could do something but before he had a chance Kendall kicked Ryan making him fall to the ground. Kendall smiled as he pointed the gun at Ryan. Logan sighed with relief.

"It's over Ryan. Just give up." Ryan was clutching his stomach and withering in pain. Kendall took a step towards Ryan but he suddenly sat up pointing another, smaller gun at Kendall. Logan and Kendall both gasped as Ryan fired hitting Kendall in the chest.

"KENDALL!" Logan went to run to him but Ryan pointed the gun at Logan. He slowly stood up and spit out some blood.

"It's over." Logan looked past Ryan to see Kendall lying on the floor. Tears were streaming down his face because he knew there was nothing left he could do. Logan let a few tears spill as Kendall mouthed, "I love you." Logan looked away and closed his eyes.

"I love you Kendall." The sound of doors bursting open and multiple footsteps could be heard.

"DROP YOUR WEAPON!"

"GET DOWN NOW!" Logan opened his eyes to see multiple security guards and police officers. Logan smiled but frowned when he noticed Ryan was fuming.

"I'm not letting you get away. I'm not… I'm not… I'M NOT!" Ryan pointed the gun at Logan making him scream. The officers fired hitting Ryan multiple times. His eyes were wide and blood seeped out of his mouth as he fell to his knees. Ryan's eye's rolled back and he fell to the ground. Logan took the opportunity to run to Kendall. He fell down next to him and shook his shoulders.

"Kendall! Kendall baby can you hear me? Please answer me! KENDALL!" EMT's ran into the room and a police officer grabbed Logan. Logan fought to get out of the officers grip wanting to stay with Kendall. "Let go I have to stay with him! LET ME GO!" The officer kept his hold on Logan and soon noticed the blood trickling down the back of Logan's neck.

"Son, please there is nothing you can do for your friend. Let the paramedics take care of him. You need to get checked out too. You'll see him again." Logan stopped fighting and allowed the officer to lead him to another paramedic. They put him in an ambulance and the whole ride the only person he could think about was Kendall.

"Son?" Logan snapped out of his thoughts and looked up at a young female paramedic. She gave him a comforting smile and placed her hand on his shoulder. "Can you tell me your name?"

"Logan."

"Ok Logan you're going to be fine. Do you have a phone? So you can call your family?" Logan nodded and silently pulled out his phone. Before he pressed call he turned to the paramedic with tears in his eyes.

"Is he going to be ok?" The paramedic sighed and gave Logan a sad smile.

"We are going to do all we can to help your friend. I promise." Logan nodded and left it at that. It would be unfair of him to make her promise anything more than that. Logan put his phone to his ear listening as it rang three times.

"_Hello?"_

"J-James." Logan suddenly found himself breaking down crying.

"_Logan? What's going on?"_

"Kendall was shot." Logan let out a sob and clutched the phone tightly. "We're on our way to the hospital."

"_Oh god… We're on our way!"_ Logan hung up and lay back against the stretcher. When they pulled up to the hospital Kendall had already gotten there and was brought inside. Logan's injuries were minor. He had a large cut on the back of his head that required stitches but he didn't have a concussion or any other damage. Once he was patched up Logan went to the waiting room until he got news on Kendall. James, Carlos, Katie, and Mrs. Knight burst through the front door of the hospital and ran over to Logan as soon as they spotted him.

"Logan!" Logan stood and let Carlos pull him into a hug. James hugged him next then Mrs. Knight, then Katie.

"Have you heard anything on Kendall?" Mrs. Knight's voice was filled with fear. It made sense considering her son could be dying. Logan looked down and shook his head. The others sighed and sat down for the long wait.

* * *

Logan glanced at the clock for the hundredth time. 5 hours, that's how long they had been waiting. No one had any information on Kendall and no doctors had come to see them. Mrs. Knight and Katie were starting to freak out and James and Carlos were getting anxious. Logan went to lean back in his chair but the grip Carlos and James had on him was making movement difficult. It was like they were trying to keep Logan together as well as themselves.

"Kendall Knight?" They all shot up as a doctor walked over to them. Logan's heart was beating rapidly. Was Kendall ok?

"Is Kendall ok?" The doctor looked up from his chart to look at Logan. He let out a sigh making Logan fear the worst.

"We were able to stabilize him but that doesn't mean he is out of the woods yet. He has a 50% percent chance of living through the night. If he can do that, then I have high hopes for his survival." Logan nodded taking in the information. It may have sounded like pretty good news but it actually wasn't. 50% chance of living also meant a 50% chance of dying. He could lose him.

"Can we see him?" Carlos looked to the doctor hopefully but his hope was crushed when he shook his head.

"I'm afraid not. It is a very critical time right now. He can't have any visitors until tomorrow night. The best you can do is go home and get some rest." They all nodded and slowly made their way out of the hospital. The car ride was agonizingly quiet except for the few whimpers and sobs that came out of Katie. When they reached the Palm Woods the three boys ignored their friends and went straight to their apartment. Mrs. Knight and Katie went straight to bed leaving Carlos, James, and Logan alone in the living room.

"What do we do?" Carlos seemed so lost. It broke James and Logan's hearts.

"I don't know. Really we can only wait for the hospital to call with news on Kendall. I think we should get some rest. We'll need all the sleep we can get." Carlos nodded and he started walking with James to their room. They stopped and turned around when they noticed Logan hadn't moved. "Logan?" Logan looked up at his two friends with fear in his eyes.

"What if we lose him? I can't… I can't lose him." James went over to Logan and enveloped him in a tight hug. Carlos joined and they stayed like that for a long time. Eventually, sleep seemed to be calling the three boys as they swayed back and forth ready to pass out. They each went to their rooms and was knocked out the minute they dropped down on their beds.

* * *

"Logan awoke with a frown as the previous day's events came back to him. He glanced at his clock and realized it was only 2 in the morning. Logan sighed and stood up. He didn't see himself getting back to sleep any time soon so he decided to wait by the phone. He walked into the kitchen and poured himself a glace of juice. He took the plate of cookies from the counter and set it in front of him as he sat down at the counter and stared at the phone.

An hour later and Logan was still sitting in the same spot. The cookies and juice were gone leaving Logan with nothing to do but stare at the phone. Logan let out a sigh and got up from his seat. They probably wouldn't call at this hour so he went to go back to bed but then the phone suddenly rang. Logan grabbed it at its first ring. Before anyone else could even register that it had gone off. He held the phone to his ear taking in a shaky breath.

"H-hello?"

"This is the Saint Peter's Hospital. I apologize for calling at this hour but I am calling in concern for Kendall Knight?"

"Yes." Logan's heart was racing as he waited to here to status on the love of his life.

**A/N: and there is the end of another chapter. I hope you enjoyed it. it seemed a little rushed to me… idk. Anyway,**

**There is more to come.**


	14. gone

James woke up the next morning and sighed. He was lying on his back and staring straight up at the ceiling. He had been able to fall asleep but it wasn't a deep sleep. He woke up numerous times and he still felt tired. James turned slightly and glanced at the clock. It was after 10, why didn't the hospital call?

"Do you think Kendall is ok?" James jumped slightly. He hadn't realized Carlos was awake. James turned his head and looked at Carlos who was lying on his back and looking at James.

"I don't know, but we can only hope." They both got up and as they walked out of their room Carlos turned to James.

"You know, I swear I heard the phone ring but it was like half a second so I thought it was my imagination." James nodded; he thought heard the phone too. "Well we should probably get Logan…" Carlos stopped in his tracks making James look at him. Carlos face was filled with concern and when James looked up he knew why. Logan was sitting on the floor with his back against the kitchen counter. His legs were bent slightly and parted allowing his hands to rest lazily between them. He was staring straight ahead not acknowledging James and Carlos' presence. James slowly walked over to Logan and knelt down next to him. He peered at Logan's hands and noticed he had a death grip on the phone. Tears were streaming down Logan's face but there was no other emotion. He seemed like he was in shock. James put his hand on Logan's shoulder but he still didn't move.

"Logan? Did they call?" Logan nodded his head. "When."

"Two." James furrowed his eyebrows and looked up at Carlos.

"You've been sitting here for eight hours?" Logan didn't answer. "What did they say?" Logan remained silent for a long time. He opened his mouth then closed it again making James and Carlos sigh.

"He's gone." James and Carlos's head shot up and they both gasped.

"What?" They both said simultaneously.

"He's gone… h-he's gone… he's gone." Logan continued to chant as Carlos sank to the floor and began sobbing. James turned away from Logan to comfort Carlos. He pulled him into a hug letting his own tears stream down his face.

"Oh god, this can't be happening." Carlos buried his face in James' chest and wrapped his arms around his torso. They stayed unmoving like that until Carlos was able to compose himself. Carlos remained in James' embrace but then he was suddenly worried for Logan. He stopped chanting a few minutes ago and he was completely silent. Carlos pulled away from James and crawled so he was sitting in front of Logan. Tears continued to stream down Logan's face but he wasn't sobbing or even moving at all. It was scary. Carlos exchanged a worried look with James and they both put their hands on Logan's shoulders. "Logie, talk to me." Logan ignored Carlos and started chanting again.

"He can't be… he's… he can't… I can't believe…" James pushed Carlos over a little and grabbed Logan's shoulders shaking him slightly.

"Logan snap out of it! There is nothing we can do, Kendall is dead!" Carlos let out a small sob as James said the words. Logan's eyes snapped into focus and looked at James. Logan pushed passed James and stood up. He turned around and faced his two friends.

"No he's not! I don't believe it! He's alive! He has to be!" James stood up and started to walk towards Logan but Logan backed away from him.

"Logan please…" Logan was breathing heavily as tears streamed down his face at an unimaginable rate.

"NO, STAY AWAY FROM ME! I WAN"T KENDALL! I DON"T WANT YOU!" James grabbed Logan's arm but Logan yanked out of his grasp.

"Logan please stop. He's gone."

"STOP SAYING THAT! HE"S NOT GONE! GET ME KENDALL! I WANT KENDALL!"

"I can't get Kendall he's dead!" Logan covered his ears with his hands.

"STOP IT!" James grabbed Logan and pulled him to his chest. Logan pushed against his chest and continued to try and get away from James. James started to cry again at the sad state of his friend.

"GET OFF OF ME! I ONLY WANT KENDALL!" KENDALL! Please…" Logan went limp in James's embrace and fell to his knees. He started sobbing uncontrollably as James wrapped his arms tightly around him. Logan wrapped his arms around James' neck and put all his weight against him. His emotions crashed down on him making him feel heavy and light headed. James was crying silently as he tried his best to comfort Logan who could not be comforted.

"Logan." James felt Carlos put his hand on his back in order to steady himself. Carlos knelt down and ran his fingers through Logan's hair trying his best to help James.

"What's going on out here?" Carlos and James turned to see Mrs. Knight walking into the living room. Logan's screaming had obviously alerted her. When she spotted the three boys she looked to each of them but they didn't speak. James shook his head and tightened his hold on Logan while Carlos tore his eyes away from Mrs. Knight and began crying again. Mrs. Knight covered her mouth and let a small sob out when the realization of what was happening hit her. She didn't move from her spot until Katie came out of her room wondering what was going on. When Logan finally quieted down he returned to his emotionless state. He pulled away from James and stood up. He was planning to go back to his room but Carlos grabbed his arm.

"Logan don't shut yourself out. We need to help each other… we have to grieve together." Logan ripped his arm from Carlos's grasps.

"I don't have anything to grieve about. He's NOT gone!" Logan ran to his room before James or Carlos could stop him. They stayed silent trying to figure out what to do with themselves. If Kendall was around he would have a plan for them. He would know what to do with Logan; he would know what steps to take. If Kendall were with them though, they wouldn't be in this situation. James stood up and Carlos stood up with him. They silently walked towards Logan's room and knocked on the door.

"Logan! Open the door!" When they were met with silence they both sighed and sat down on the ground. They wanted to grieve but they didn't have time to. They both decided at that moment that once they got Logan through this, they would do all the grieving they wanted.

* * *

Logan ignored when James knocked on his door. He looked around his and Kendall's room and moved to Kendall's bed. When he sat down he frowned at how cold the bed was. No one had slept in it in a while… and no one would sleep in it again. Logan shrieked, how could he even think that? Kendall was coming back. He didn't care what the hospital said. They were stupid and didn't know shit. It was a mistake… it had to be. Logan heard more knocking on his door. It was more frantic now but he once again ignored it. Logan lay back on Kendall's bed in a fetal position. He stared at the opposite side of the room then let out a sigh and furiously rubbed his hands over his face. When Logan pulled his hand away he noticed his ring was still on his finger. He took it off and examined it.

"Always and Forever." Logan whispered to himself. He felt tears come to his eyes as he held the ring in his fist. He unclenched his hand and slipped the ring back on before getting up to pace the room. "It's a mistake. He's not dead. I know it… he's not dead… he's not dead… he's not dead… HE'S NOT DEAD!" Logan screamed and kicked his night stand. His desk lamp and books fell to the floor as he grabbed the corner and knocked it over. Logan continued to massively destroy his room as he screamed and cried at the top of his lungs. When there was nothing left he looked at all the destruction. The nightstand was across the room, the bed was flipped over and there were random objects all over the floor. Logan let out another sob and grabbed his head. He sunk to the floor and bent forward leaning his head on the floor.

* * *

When James and Carlos heard Logan scream they shot up and started banging on the door again. There was no more noise coming from Logan's room but that suddenly changed when they heard screaming, sobbing, and the sound of things breaking. James banged on the door yelling for Logan to stop while Carlos ran to the other room. He couldn't help but feel a little Déjà vu. Logan was upset and he had to break into his room. He had done this before but back then he was doing it at a request from Kendall. Now Kendall wasn't here to help them. When they finally got the door open Logan was bent over on the floor. His furniture and his things were everywhere. James and Carlos hurried over to Logan and pulled him into a hug. He struggled at first but then he eventually gave up and clung to them desperately. Carlos and James knew there were different stages to grief but this was ridiculous. Logan seemed to be going through all the stages on hyper drive and apparently he was on repeat. He denied it, then got angry, then sad, then denied it again. The only thing he seemed to be skipping was acceptances but they knew he wasn't going to be accepting it any time soon. They still couldn't accept it. When Logan quieted down again they removed him from his room considering that there was no possible way he could stay in there now. They brought him to James and Carlos' room and laid him on Carlos' bed. It was way too early for him to be going to sleep but considering he was up since 2 in the morning they weren't surprised when he passed out. James and Carlos both sighed and left their room. They went to the living room and sat down on the couch. The sobbing coming from Katie's room seemed to just register to them and it sent them over the edge. James buried his face in his hands and cried silently. Carlos leaned against James as he sobbed. How were they going to get through this?

* * *

Logan was dead. He wasn't dead like Kendall but James and Carlos had never seen him so lifeless. When he woke up he didn't talk to anyone. At dinner no one really talked but everyone but Logan tried to make conversation. As soon as Logan finished eating he silently got up and left the table. He didn't ask to be excused and he didn't take his plate to the sink like he usually did. He was just going through life like a zombie. The next day James and Carlos tried to get him to go outside but that didn't help much. He sat at a table with his head lying against it completely ignoring everyone. Jo tried to talk to him, Camille tried to talk to him, everyone tired to talk to him but he just ignored them. But they really didn't try as hard as they should. They were to depressed themselves to try. The Palm Woods had never been so miserable. After a few hours Logan silently got up and walked back to apartment 2J. That was the last time he ever planned on coming out.

"James, I'm worried about him." James nodded at Carlos as they watched Logan walk off. Considering all he had been through he was seconds away from snapping. For all they knew he had already snapped. They had to keep a close eye on him. They didn't want to lose two friends. James and Carlos got up and went back to 2J. They had decided after Logan's episode to take the locks off all the doors. The last thing they wanted was for Logan to be behind a locked door. Logan didn't protest when they did this. He didn't have the energy to protest anything anymore. When they got back to 2J Logan was in his room silently cleaning up the mess. He had moved his nightstand back to its original place and Kendall's bed was fixed again. All that was left for him to do was to pick everything else off the floor. James and Carlos silently walked in and started helping him. It took them about an hour but once they were done. Logan lay down on the bed not acknowledging James or Carlos at all. James sighed and left the room. Carlos stayed watching Logan for a moment. He wanted to help him but he didn't know what to do. After standing staring at Logan for a good five minutes Carlos finally gave up and left. He wasn't Kendall… he didn't have all the answers.

* * *

After an hour Logan sat up from his bed and walked into his bathroom. He silently opened the draw and pulled out a pair of scissors. "What's the point anymore?" Logan slide down the wall and sat on the floor.

* * *

Nurse Jones sat at her station doing her paperwork. She let out a sigh as another popping sound came to her ears. She glanced over and glared at the nurse station at the desk next to her. Her name was Tiffany Williams and she was an idiot. How she became a nurse was one of the questions that plagued Nurse Jones mind every day. Tiffany blew a bubble and popped it again making Nurse Jones growl under her breath. Tiffany was a young arrogant woman who really didn't seem to give a shit about anyone. Whenever so talked to patients she acted bored, even when she was talking about something serious. Nurse Jones always felt bad for the poor families that were told by her that they're loved ones had passed. Tiffany never showed concern for them. Nurse Jones turned back to her paper and scanned over two files. She furrowed her eyebrows when she noticed something. "Why haven't this family visited yet?" She turned to Tiffany and rolled her eyes. She was pulling her gum out of her mouth like it was taffy. "Tiffany, did you call those two families yesterday?"

"Yea, the Knights and the Johnsons." Tiffany rolled her eyes like it was obvious.

"Did you tell them that they could come visit their family member?" She waved her hand at Nurse Jones.

"Yea, yea, yea I did it." At the moment a woman a man and to kids walked into the hospital. They looked extremely happy and somewhat shocked.

"Hi, we are here for Jason Johnson." Nurse Jones gave the family a sad smile but she still couldn't figure out why they looked so happy.

"Yes, he was moved already and I'm so sorry for your loss." The woman and man looked at each other with a frown.

"What are you talking about?" Nurse Jones furrowed her eyebrows.

"Your son Jason… was in an accident correct?" The Johnson family nodded. "He was killed. You were notified early this morning."

"We were told he was fine! That he made it through the night and would make a full recovery!" Nurse Jones gasped realizing the mistake. If this family was told their son lived then... Nurse Jones shot up and stormed over to Tiffany. She turned her chair around and glared at her. Tiffany looked up at her while she chewed her gum like a cow.

"What?"

"You imbecile! Do you know what you've done! You mixed up the files! You told the Johnsons that Jason lived and you told the Knights Kendall died!" Tiffany still looked bored.

"I don't get what you're getting at."

"KENDALL ISN"T THE DEAD ONE YOU DUMB AS BITCH!" Tiffany was taken aback by Nurse Jones outburst. Normally Nurse Jones was a sweet tolerant woman but crushing two families like that crossed the line. First the Knights were told their love one was dead then the Johnsons had to find out their loved one was dead after their spirits had been lifted. Nurse Jones ran to Kendall Knight's file and dialed the number. She hoped she wasn't too late.

* * *

Mrs. Knight walked over to the phone as it rang. She wiped her eyes as she held it to her ear.

"Hello?"

"_Hello this is the Saint Peter's Hospital may I speak to Challen Knight?"_ Mrs. Knight furrowed her eyebrows.

"This is she."

"_Mrs. Knight I have some good and bad news for you. By a mistake made by one of our younger nurses two files were mixed up. I am so sorry for the emotion pain this has caused you."_ Mrs. Knight held on to the phone tightly. What could this mean? She didn't want to think of something positive for it to only crash down on her.

"Go on."

"_This leads me to the good news. Your son Kendall Knight is alive. He's stable and should wake up soon. He will make a full recovery."_ Mrs. Knight gasped and felt tears come to her eyes.

"Oh my god! Thank you! Thank you so much!" Mrs. Knight started sobbing alerting James and Carlos.

"Mama Knight are you ok?" She turned to James and Carlos with a bright smile.

"There was a mix up at the hospital. They mixed Kendall up with another patient. He's alive!" James and Carlos' eyes widened and they screamed for joy. They were laughing and jumping around as they hugged each other. Mrs. Knight collected herself and smiled warmly at the boys. "I'll go tell Katie. I bet there is someone who would appreciate the news a lot more than any of us." James and Carlos nodded and ran towards Logan's room.

"Logan guess what Kendall…" James stopped in his tracks his eyes widening. Carlos stopped as well when he saw what was going on in front of him.

"LOGAN!"

**A/N: I could never kill Kendall… but did I kill Logan! You'll have to wait and see =]**

**There is more to come.**


	15. awake

**A/N: ok firstly, over 100 reviews SWEET! You guys r awesome and your reviews always make me laugh. Also, I FINALLY GOT MY BTR CD! WOOO! =]**

**if you have a fav song tell me in a review. my favs are worldwide, till i forget about you, nothing even matters, halfway there, big night and oh yeah**

Where am I…? Why is it so dark… so painful?" Kendall could feel himself entering consciousness. He could hear everything around him and feel everything but his eyes still wouldn't open. Kendall groaned and focused all his energy on getting his eyes open. When his eye lids finally lifted he shut them immediately from the lights above him. Kendall raised one of his arms and opened his eyes again. With his arm blocking the light he was able to get his eyes fully open. He looked around the room for a minute taking everything in. The first word that came to his mind was hospital. He was in a hospital and with that knowledge the past events came back to him in a flash. Getting shot, Logan screaming his name, Ryan going to shoot Logan, Ryan getting shot, and blackness. Kendall felt someone grip his hand so he turned his head to the side. Carlos and James were smiling at him but something was off. There smiles didn't reach their eyes.

"Hey Kendall, it's good to see you buddy." Carlos' voice was low and soothing but it shook like he was thinking about something unpleasant. James remained quiet and only squeezed Kendall's hand. Kendall turned his head to the other side and saw his mother and sister asleep in two chairs. He turned back to James and Carlos.

"Where," Kendall cleared his throat trying to sound less hoarse, "Where is Logan?" James and Carlos gave each other looks then turned back to Kendall.

"He uh..." James sighed. "I know you're not in great condition but you need to know. When the hospital first called us… they told us you were dead." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows.

"I was dead." James and Carlos shook their heads.

"No, they mixed you up with another patient. They called us the next day but… the first call had already done its damage." The gears in Kendall's head were beginning to turn and he was suddenly worried.

"Where is Logan?"

"Kendall, Logan tried to kill himself." Kendall gasped and went to sit up. He immediately cried out in pain and lay back down. James and Carlos immediately stood alarmed by Kendall's cry of pain. Kendall stayed motionless until the pain dulled. When it did he turned his attention to James and Carlos again.

"Where. Is. Logan!"

"His getting stitches." Carlos blurted out. He didn't want to drag it out anymore. They could tell Kendall what happened after they assured him Logan was alive. "He should be coming to your room in a couple minutes so we need to make this explanation quick." Carlos nodded at James and James sighed turning to Kendall.

"He was really depressed Kendall. He thought you were dead. He refused to talk to us… to anyone. When we got the call that you were alive we went to Logan's room to find him…"

(Flashback)

After an hour Logan sat up from his bed and walked into his bathroom. He silently opened the draw and pulled out a pair of scissors. "What's the point anymore?" Logan slide down the wall and sat on the floor.

He opened the scissors eyeing the blades for a moment. Logan felt absolutely lifeless. He didn't feel anything as he stared at those blades. Logan lifted his chin and held the scissors to his neck. His hands were shaking and tears started streaming down his face. He shivered when the cold metal touched his skin. Logan pressed down feeling the scissors pierce his skin. He started to drag getting close to an important vain when the scissors were suddenly gone. Logan's eyes shot open and James was kneeling in front of him. Logan watched silently as James frantically grabbed a wash cloth and pressed it to Logan's neck. Logan could hear Carlos screaming for Mrs. Knight. When she ran in she gasped. Logan shot his eyes and tried to push James away.

"Stop." James looked at Logan with disbelief.

"Logan, I'm not going to let you kill yourself!" Logan let out a sob and pressed his head against the wall.

"I can't… I can't." Carlos knelt next to James and placed his hand on Logan's shoulder.

"Yes you can because you were right. Kendall is alive. You have to stay alive for us and for Kendall." Logan eyes shot open. He stared at Carlos like he had five heads.

"What…"

"He's alive." Logan looked around widely and started sobbing more. It wasn't the reaction James and Carlos were expecting to get.

"Oh god… I'm so sorry… I'm sorry." James cupped Logan's face to stop him from moving. He was making it difficult for James to put pressure on his neck.

"It's ok. We're going to get you to the hospital then you can see Kendall." Logan's breathing calmed and he stilled. A smile tugged at his lips.

"Kendall…"

(End Flashback)

"After that we got him to the hospital and now he's getting stitches on his neck. It wasn't a bad cut. He won't have a scar and he'll heal soon." Kendall stared at James with disbelief but then sighed and lowered his head back against the bed.

"He's ok?" Carlos nodded.

"Yea but I think he's ashamed and embarrassed. Also, he's afraid of what you'll think of him." Kendall nodded in understanding. They all turned their attention to the door when it creaked open. Logan poked his head in but retreated slightly when he noticed all eyes were on him. After another minute he opened the door and walked in. Logan stood by the door awkwardly. He was too afraid to go to his friends but they could see in his eyes that he desperately wanted to be by Kendall's side. James and Carlos abruptly stood up making Logan flinch slightly. He kept his eyes down as Carlos walked past him. James went to Mrs. Knight and Katie and woke them up. When they noticed Kendall was awake they smiled and went to his side. They hugged him and talked for a minute before they took notice of Logan. Mrs. Knight, James, and Katie walked out so Kendall and Logan could have some privacy. Kendall slowly sat up so he could get a better view of Logan. He frowned when he noticed his super pale skin, slight hint of purple under his eyes from lack of sleep, and the fact that his eyes were red and puffy from crying. Kendall frowned more when he noticed the white bandage on the left side of Logan's neck.

"Logan…" Kendall didn't know what to say. "Please come here baby." Logan took a small step forward but then stepped back quickly and shook his head. He started to shake as tears came to his eyes.

"You hate me." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"Why would you think that?"

"You're here because of me and I-I should have come to see you sooner a-and I…" Logan trailed off and brushed his fingers over the bandage. "I'm sure Carlos and James told you already. You must be ashamed of me." Logan looked down and backed up a few feet intending to leave. He heard shuffling and looked up to see Kendall trying to get out of bed. Logan gasped and ran to his side. He placed his hands on Kendall's shoulders to keep him down. "No! You have to stay in bed." Logan gasped when he felt hands on his wrists. Logan tried to pull away but Kendall wouldn't release his hold. "Let go."

"Look at me." Logan kept his head turned refusing to look at Kendall. He didn't want to see the anger and disappointment. "Logan, Look. At. Me." Logan reluctantly looked up meeting Kendall's eyes. He gasped when he noticed the tears streaming down his face.

"Kendall…" Kendall let out a sob and released one of Logan's wrists so he could cup his face.

"I'm so sorry you went through that. It's not your fault that I got hurt and it's not your fault that you didn't come see me. You were told I was dead. I can't imagine what that would have felt like. I could never imagine losing you so even if it was brief, the thought that you suffered because of me just kills me. None of this is your fault and I'm not ashamed by you. I love you so much Logan." Kendall ran his fingers over Logan's bandage. "I'm going to be here for you and I never want you to hurt yourself ever again." Logan nodded. He sat up on Kendall's bed wanting to hug him but he didn't want to hurt him. Sensing this Kendall moved over slightly and pulled Logan down next to him. Logan curled up into Kendall's side and laid his head on Kendall's shoulder. He could see Kendall's chest rising and falling making tears come to his eyes. Kendall glanced down when he felt Logan shaking in his arms. He began to sob quietly and clung to Kendall. "Logie? What's wrong?" Logan continued to sob and buried his face in Kendall's shoulder.

"You alive… I love you so much Kendall. I'm so happy you're alive." Kendall kissed Logan's head and pulled him close. Logan looked up at Kendall and propped himself above him slightly. Logan leaned down and attached his and Kendall's lips. He moved his lips against Kendall's desperately, he needed this. Kendall moved his hand to the back of Logan's neck deepening the kiss. When Kendall forced his tongue in Logan's mouth Logan moaned. After a few minutes they pulled apart and stared into each other's eyes. They were both panting as they tried to take in as much air as they could.

"I love you." Logan smiled and kissed Kendall softly.

"I love you too." Logan leaned back down against Kendall and let out a sigh. He closed his eyes and allowed himself to drift off into the best sleep he's had in a while. Kendall sighed and kissed the top of Logan's head. He laid his head against the pillow and closed his eyes drifting off to sleep.

* * *

Logan could feel someone touching his face softly as he awoke. He opened his eyes and smiled when he was met by Kendall's face. Kendall was stroking Logan's cheek as he stared into his eyes lovingly. Logan continued to stare at Kendall until tears came to his eyes. He shut his eyes quickly trying to stop the tears from falling but a few tears managed to slip down his cheek. Kendall frowned and wiped the tears away.

"Why are you crying?" Logan opened his eyes and gave Kendall a sad smile.

"The first thing I thought when I woke up was that it was all just a dream but then I felt your hand on me and when I opened your eyes you're here." Logan moved his head and leaned his forehead against Kendall's. "I'm just so happy you're alive." Kendall smiled and kissed Logan's lips softly. They stayed like that for a long time until someone cleared their throat. Logan looked up and blushed. Carlos and James were standing at the foot of the bed with smirks on their faces.

"Well you two are doing well." Carlos chuckled at James' comment making Logan blush more.

"Oh shut up." Kendall, James, and Carlos laughed at Logan. When they all quieted down James smile widened.

"Anyway, the doctors said you should be able to leave the hospital in about two weeks. By then your injury should be mostly healed. Kendall nodded.

"So… what happened while I was out?" Logan looked away from Kendall and James and Carlos looked down. "That bad?" Carlos nodded.

"We all need you Kendall. You can't imagine what it was like thinking we would never see you again." Kendall nodded again.

"It was a blur for me," James added, "I can remember it but I feel like everyone else was on fast forward while I was stuck on pause." James looked down to the floor and sniffed. "I never realized losing one of my best friends would hurt so much." Kendall gave James a sad smile and waved him over. James moved to Kendall's side and pulled him into a hug. Kendall pulled Logan into the hug as well and after a few seconds Carlos jumped onto the bed and jumped on top of them. He was careful with Kendall so most of his body weight was put on Logan who let out a pained sound as air was forced out of him.

"Carlos! Really?" Carlos gave Logan a bright smile and all four boys started laughing. Everything was finally alright. Kendall was fine, Logan was fine, and everything would be ok again.

**A/N: done for this chapter. YEY! Everyone's ok… for now… JK! Everything is right for the world I don't plan on adding anymore angst. I'm probably going to add a few more chapters just to wrap up the story. *sniff* that means it's almost over! **

**There is more to come.**

**P.S. there might be a little more mistakes in this than usual. (idk if I make that many mistakes but im going to assume I do lol) I wanted to get this up as soon as possible. I didn't want anyone to hunt me down because I haven't really been staying on my normal schedule. I have a life people! lol**


	16. home

Logan sighed as he examined himself in the mirror. His face was a fresh healthy color and he looked like he was getting plenty of sleep but he still had the bandage on his neck. People had been starting to ask questions and it's not like the old "I cut myself while shaving" excuse could work. The next best thing he could think to tell people was that he cut himself on a tree branch and lie about having stitches under the bandage but people were starting to get suspicious. He didn't want people to know what he tried to do. He didn't want them to judge him. They already did enough of that and how they saw him was already majorly different then how they saw him a year ago. Logan sighed again; he was so tempted to throw on a turtle neck or something but in LA that would be very odd. It would give the kids at the Palm Woods even more reason to think he was lying. Why would he try and cover his neck if he didn't have to hide anything? Logan shook his head and smiled. He had to remember why he was up so really on a Saturday morning. Kendall was coming home for the hospital today. It had been two and a half long weeks. Kendall stayed an extra few days because the pain from his injury brought on a small fever but now he was perfectly fine and ready to come home.

"Let's go boys we're going to be late!" Logan ran out of the bathroom quickly smiling brightly. Mrs. Knight was standing by the door waiting for the boys to join her. After Logan Carlos came out of his room next, then Katie. They all turned around waiting for James to walk out of the bathroom. When he didn't show they all sighed.

"Let's go James!" Carlos yelled.

"I need to spend 20 more minutes on my hair or it won't come out right!" Logan's eye twitched. He walked towards the bathroom and everyone's eyebrows rose when they heard a yelp. "Logan! What the hell. I'm not done!" Logan was pushing James towards the door ignoring his protests.

"My man is getting out of the hospital today and I will not be late!" Carlos looked to Mrs. Knight and Katie as Logan walked pasted them. He was obviously too annoyed at James to realize what he just said. Oh… he planned on teasing him about it very soon.

* * *

Logan was the first one in Kendall's room. Kendall was sitting on the bed fully dressed and ready to go. When he spotted Logan he smiled and went to stand. Logan stopped and crossed his arms until Kendall huffed and sat back down.

"You know we've definitely been in this situation before." Logan smiled and walked over to Kendall kissing him softly.

"Yes and like I knew I could walk that time I know you can walk but your still using the wheel chair. At least to the car anyway." Kendall smiled and wrapped his arms around Logan's waist. He spread his legs so Logan could stand between them.

"That's fine because the sooner I get in a wheel chair the sooner I can be at home with you." Logan smiled and kissed Kendall again. He pulled away when he heard someone walking in. Carlos walked in pushing a wheel chair in front of him. He placed it by Kendall's bed and stepped back allowing Logan to get behind the wheel chair as Kendall sat down. "Ok, let's get home." Carlos and Logan smiled and pushed him towards the car where everyone else was waiting.

* * *

When they reached the Palm Woods everyone was happy to see Kendall doing well. Jo, Stephanie, Rachael and Camille ran over to him and hugged him gently as soon as he walked through the door. Others either told him how happy they were to see him or that they were glad he was safe. Kendall kept a smile on his face as they passed everyone. It was nice to be back surrounded by familiar faces. Although he didn't miss how Logan walked a little ahead of them and kept his chin down. He was the first one to the elevator and he only smiled at people as he walked past them. He didn't stop to talk to anyone like Kendall did. When they reached 2J Logan went straight to the bathroom. Kendall gave James and Carlos a questioning look but they just shrugged. When Logan went to his and Kendall's room Kendall was sitting on his bed. He smiled happy to see Kendall finally filling up the space that had been empty for too long but when he noticed Kendall's expression he frowned.

"What's wrong Kendall?" Logan moved to Kendall's side and sat next to him. His face was full of concern. Kendall sighed heavily and turned to Logan.

"You tell me." Logan furrowed his eyebrows.

"I don't… I don't understand." Kendall turned so he was facing Logan. He took his hand and held it over Logan's lap.

"Why are you avoiding everyone? All our friends?" Logan sighed and looked towards his lap.

"I didn't think it was that noticeable." Kendall scoffed making Logan look up at him questioningly.

"Trust me it was very noticeable." Logan nodded slowly and looked back down. "Can you tell me what's going on now?" Logan sighed.

"People have been asking questions… about my neck." Kendall nodded in understanding. He lifted his hand to Logan's chin so he would look at him.

"Logan…" Kendall sighed. "I don't really know what to say. You don't need to tell them what you tried to do. It's in your past and I'm not saying you shouldn't regret doing it… you should but you also shouldn't be ashamed of yourself. You've gone through a lot this past year." Logan leaned against Kendall and wrapped his arms around him softly. He wanted to wrap his arms around him tightly but he didn't want to hurt him.

"I know I don't have to tell anyone but they keep asking and if they found out… I don't think they would ever look at me the same again. They would think I was crazy. They've already gone against me before nothing while stop them if they find out." Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan and kissed the top of his head.

"No matter what I will always be here for you Logan, and so will James, Carlos, Katie, my mom, Kelly, Jo, Camille… you have plenty of people who while always be there for you." Logan shook his head and pulled away.

"You can't know that for sure. Things happen. I mean look at you! For two full days I thought you were gone! You were gone! You weren't there for me! Don't promise me something you know you can't keep!" Kendall put his hands on Logan's shoulders.

"Is that why you've been acting strange? Because you're afraid you'll lose all your friends because of what happened?" Logan nodded closing his eyes as tears fell.

"I've lost so much already. If they found out I'd lose more then I would have almost no one. It wouldn't take much to lose the only family I have left." Kendall shook his head and whipped away Logan's tears.

"That is not true. You can't get rid of me that easily so get used to me being around. Even when I'm getting on your nerves and you want me gone I'll never leave your side." Logan laughed softly and laced Kendall's fingers with his own.

"I love you Kendall."

"I love you too." Kendall lay back in his bed and pulled Logan with him. He sighed heavily and smiled. He ran his hands up and down Logan's sides loving the soft noises that came out of him. It was almost like he was purring softly. When he sensed Logan had drifted off to sleep Kendall kissed Logan's head and closed his own eyes. "I will always protect you. I'll never make you suffer like that again."

**A/N: DONE! This was hard to write. Major writers block which I should actually call end of story block. This story is basically over. There isn't much I could add to it. I planned on going until at least chapter 20 but I don't think I can do that. So I think the next chapter will be the last. It's probably going to suck just like this one but I'll try to give you guys a good ending. I mean I have to I didn't put all my energy into both S.C.F.S and S.C.F.D to have a crap ending. So enjoy it while it last because we are reaching the end of the road.**

**But the good news is I have an idea for another story. I thought of it while watching Criminal Minds. I've been watching it none stop for the past two weeks and one of the episodes gave me an idea. So once this is over I'll start with that. It will be Logan centered as per usual and I'm not sure if it will be a Kogan. Most likely will but if it is Kendall and Logan will be an established couple from the start. I'm not going to have the usual "I love him but he is my best friend and I can't love him" kind of stuff. I don't have a title for the story yet (that's how new the idea is) but it's going to be centered around something from Logan's past… anyway, hope you somehow managed to enjoy the crap-tastic chapter.**

**There is more to come. **


	17. end

"Loooogaaan… where are you!" Kendall walked slowly through the Palm Woods Park. He was dressed in all black with black lines under his eyes. It was night out and the only light he could get was from his small flashlight and the Palm Woods right behind him. He looked around and smirked when he saw movement in a bush. He crotched down and moved slowly to the bush. When he was right in front of it he readied himself to jump out. "I got… you?" Kendall looked around, there was no one there. He screamed when he felt a sudden weight on his back. He calmed down when he could here Logan's laugh. Logan was still clinging onto Kendall's back so Kendall placed his hands under Logan's thighs to hold him up. "Ok, you got me." Logan smiled and pecked Kendall on the cheek.

"Yep. Now we have to find James and Carlos." Logan jumped off Kendall's back and went to move away but Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan's waist and pulled him close. Logan smiled and leaned close against Kendall. "You know, playing man hunt means you're supposed to look for whoever is hiding. Kendall chuckled and turned Logan around. He moved him until Logan's back was against a tree. Kendall leaned close to Logan so their lips were almost touching. Logan's eyes were half closed and his lips were parted waiting for Kendall to close the gap. Kendall smirked.

"That's true but I can tell you want to do this a lot more." Logan nodded and quickly pulled Kendall into a deep kiss. He moaned when Kendall forced his tongue into his mouth and ran it over all the sensitive areas. Logan wrapped his arms around Kendall's neck as their kiss became more desperate. They would have continued but Kendall was suddenly smacked in the back of the head. He turned around to see James and Carlos smirking at him. "OW!"

"Stop complaining you're supposed to be playing man hunt with us… remember?" James took his bag off his back and opened it. He took out a roll of toilet paper and handed it to Carlos. Carlos threw the roll at Logan who barley caught it in time.

"Come on its mischief not stop making out with your man and let's go!" Carlos laughed as Logan glared at him. He stopped laughing when Logan ran at him.

"Dam it Carlos I thought I told you never to bring that up again!" Kendall and James shook their heads as they watched their two friends running around. Carlos was screaming like a little girl while Logan chased him. They wondered how long it would take Carlos to remember he was being chased by Logan who couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag.

"Logan surprised me." Kendall turned to James with a questioning look. "I didn't think he would bounce back so quickly. I thought he would have reverted back to how he was after Ryan raped him… but he didn't." Kendall nodded and smiled in Logan's direction.

"This time he knew he could count on us and I think he was given hope that not everything is meant to be taken away from him when he found out I was alive. It's been months since I got home from the hospital but it felt like it was just yesterday. After that day he did fairly well. He stuck by us and stayed open with us. The only set back was that one Father's Day." James sighed at the memory. That had been a rough weekend. He turned back to Kendall who seemed to be deep in thought.

"What about you?" Kendall turned to James with a questioning look again. "How have you been with all that's happened?" Kendall turned back to Logan and laughed. It seemed Carlos had finally registered who was chasing him and was now chasing Logan. Logan screamed more like a girl then Carlos.

"I've been fine. As long as I have my friends and my family I have nothing to worry about." James smiled then sighed.

"I think you should go save your damsel." Kendall laughed and ran towards Carlos and Logan with James running right behind him.

* * *

-8 months later, June 10th

Logan was sitting on the couch in 2J by himself. He looked around and sighed heavily. He was hoping to spend the day with at least one of his friends but when he woke up everyone was gone. After another ten minutes Logan grew bored with reading. He set the book down and turned on the TV hoping to find something interesting to watch. The first thing that caught his eye was the movie the Notebook. He would never tell anyone but this was his favorite chick flick. He had a favorite movie for each genre. His favorite fantasy was the Lord of the Rings. His favorite comedy was the Hangover. His favorite animated movie was Ice age. His favorite Disney (which he also would never tell anyone about) was Bambi. The first time he saw this movie he was hanging out with Camille. She forced him to watch it and he wasn't too happy about it but by the end he was crying just as much as she was. After that Logan always went to chick flicks with Camille but Camille called it their gay flick night for Logan's masculinities sake. Logan looked up when he heard the front door open. He smiled when he saw Kendall walk into the apartment.

"Hey babe." Kendall smiled and walked over to Logan. He sat down next to him on the couch and kissed him softly. He turned to the TV to see what Logan was watching and raised an eyebrow.

"Are you watching the Notebook?" Logan blushed and quickly changed the channel.

"No!" Kendall laughed.

"Oh please I know it's your favorite chick flick." Logan looked at Kendall questioningly. "Camille. You may be her chick flick gay guy friend but I'm the "tell him everything" gay guy friend." Logan huffed and pouted.

"I planned on taking that fact to my grave with me."

"Well then stop telling Camille things. I didn't need to know that I had competition was a tall and muscular werewolf."

"She told you I was team Jacob too!" Logan fell back against the couch and glared at nothing. "I'm going to kill that girl." Kendall laughed and leaned back against the couch. Logan moved and cuddle into Kendall's side. They stayed silent for a long time until Kendall took in a breath making Logan look up at him.

"You know how much I love you right?" Logan nodded.

"Of course, I love you too Kendall." Kendall smiled and pulled Logan tighter to him.

"You know now that I have you I always feel bad when I see anything alone, even objects." Kendall sat up and scooted back so he was facing Logan. Logan was confused. He wasn't sure what Kendall was getting at.

"Kendall?" Kendall held up his hand to quiet him. He took a hold of Logan's left hand and held it up.

"Like your ring. It's all alone on your finger. I thought it could use a friend." Kendall got off the couch and knelt in front of Logan. Logan gasped as Kendall pulled a velvet box out of his back pocket and opened it revealing a diamond engagement ring. "Logie, will you marry me?" Kendall swallowed nervously as Logan continued to stare at him wide eyed. After a long five minutes passed Kendall laughed nervously, "Logan an answer would be nice." Logan snapped out of his shock in an instant and tackled Kendall to the ground. He kissed him and started crying hysterically.

"Yes! Kendall yes!" Kendall smiled and wiped Logan's tears away. He sat them both up and slid the ring onto Logan's finger. Logan half laughed and half cried as he stared at the ring. Kendall lifted Logan's chin and kissed his lips again.

"Now whenever you think of today I want you to remember this and nothing else." Logan's eyes widened again and then let more tears fall.

"I love you Kendall." Kendall smiled and pulled Logan into a deep kiss.

"I love you too… Always and forever."

**A/N: and that is the end. I hope you enjoyed this story. I defiantly enjoyed writing it. It's sad to see it end but the time was right. There is nothing more I could add. I don't know if this was a good ending but I think it works and with Halloween coming soon I figured the beginning of this chapter was appropriate. Anyway, I hoped you enjoyed the final chapter and unlike usual.**

**There isn't more to come.**


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